I grew up with negative parents that had a negative outlook on life, which means I tend to be a negative person. Furthermore, I was teased in school growing up, have a hard time believing that anyone is fundamentally nice rather than fundamentally mean. Does anyone have any actual suggestions to keeping a positive outlook and how to repair that damaged psyche? I hear %26#039;keep your chin up%26quot; and, yada yada. But does anyone have a real answer as to what specifically has helped to change your thinking/attitude towards something?|||Because your self-talk is mainly negative doesn%26#039;t mean you%26#039;re doomed to an unhappy or unhealthy life. I think you can learn to turn negative thinking into positive thinking. Here are some ways that helped me to become more positive:
* Check yourself. Periodically during the day, stop and evaluate what you%26#039;re thinking. If you find that your thoughts are mainly negative, try to find a way to put a positive spin on them.
* Be open to humor. Give yourself permission to smile or laugh, especially during difficult times. Seek humor in everyday happenings. When you can laugh at life, you feel less stressed.
* Surround yourself with positive people. Make sure those in your life are positive, supportive people you can depend on to give helpful advice and feedback. Negative people, those who believe they have no power over their lives, may increase your stress level and may make you doubt your ability to manage stress in healthy ways.
* Practice positive self-talk. Start by following one simple rule: Don%26#039;t say anything to yourself that you wouldn%26#039;t say to anyone else. Be gentle and encouraging with yourself. If a negative thought enters your mind, evaluate it rationally and respond with affirmations of what is good about yourself.|||I think you%26#039;ve got to take the whole %26#039;life is what you make it approach%26#039; because life is short. It%26#039;s like when a you think that a horse is going to kick you and you project it onto the horse, so it kicks you. If you automatically expect the worst from people that%26#039;s what your going to get. Maybe you should think about your friends and how amazing the people close to you can be. I could go through a thousand cheesy sayings (%26#039;a stranger%26#039;s just a friend you haven%26#039;t met%26#039;) about this but I%26#039;ll try not to.
I improved my outlook by focusing on the positives and not over-analysing things. Sometimes just taking people at face value can work.
I tend to think of all the amazing people who keep a positive outlook in much worse situations me- if they can do it I can. It%26#039;s better to misjudge someone as nice than as mean. People%26#039;s true colours show eventually.|||When you sign your name, underline it and put an exclamation mark. Seriously, spend days practicing your new signature with it underlined and an exclamation. Change your writing change your mind, don%26#039;t believe it then go look at your hand writing when you where sad, depressed or mad and compare it to when you where happy, excited or in love. I rest my case now go practice your new mind set.|||Changing you %26quot;mindset%26quot; is not always as easy as changing your underwear! Once we embrace something, good or bad, it takes quite a life changing experience to even want to make a switch!
You didn%26#039;t come out of the womb with this conditioning, it took a period of time become who you are now (It%26#039;s all bought and paid for).
Lets cut to the chase, you%26#039;ll eventually need to do this anyway, get some counseling or therapy. You%26#039;re not even sure what exactly is broke/damaged! Change doesn%26#039;t just magically happen, it%26#039;s a lifelong process!
So, where do you start? First lesson, now that you%26#039;re aware of your current frame of mindset, take/accept responsibility for fixing or changing it!|||Try Moodgym ANU
It has all these things and is like a total psych workout / remedy.
It worked for me!
Best Wishes.
Mars Mission.
14th Year Psychology / Counselling Student.
4th Year Hypnotism Student.
32 Years Qualified Auto Tech.
Sunday 5 June 2011
How can I change my attitude and start thinking like a manga/anime girl? (How do I be a nicer person?)?
I%26#039;ve got short hair and wear tomboy style clothes, and don%26#039;t do girly things, because when I was a younger teenager I made an effort to break the mould and make guy friends instead of girl friends. I wasn%26#039;t being true to myself and changed my whole attitude to the world. Now I feel kind of confused and unhappy, and I want to be feminine again.
I figure, though, that being %26#039;girly%26#039; comes from your mind, not from what you wear. Girls in manga (Tomae from Vampire Doll for example) are almost always cute, kind, helpful, caring, friendly, lovely and laid back... and manga girls are the girliest girls of them all. I%26#039;m pretty much the opposite of that at the moment (not cute, unkind, uncaring etc...)
So, I%26#039;ve decided that to feel more comfortable in myself, I need to take a lesson from manga girls and become nicer and therefore more stereotypically feminine. But how do you change your whole attitude and mindset like that? Can anyone give me any help or advice? Thanks :)|||I can tell from your well-articulated question that you are a very intelligent and thoughtful person. Use the gifts that you already have to make yourself into whatever you want to be. You don%26#039;t have to be a character in a book or magazine, you simply need to be yourself. When someone asks you to do something with or for them, respond with thoughtful honesty. Don%26#039;t attempt to be mean or kind in particular... just be human and fair.
If you allow yourself to accept yourself as you are right now, you will understand what I mean. Someone who knows who they are and what they stand for will instinctively understand that they deserve to be treated with kindness. A person with healthy self-esteem will also respond to others with likewise compassion and understanding. Work on yourself first and the rest will come.
Hope this helps.|||I can actually really relate to this.
Well let me put it this way.
I used to be a tomboy when I was younger. Im 15 now. I had all the guy friends and whatnot. I was even into the anime stuff. But actually as the years passed I became more interested with other things. Im not saying im 100% girly. Im better than I was though. Don%26#039;t take after a character or whatever. Take after yourself and go with what your mind, heart and soul tells you.
Do whatever you want and thats exactly what makes you, you.
I figure, though, that being %26#039;girly%26#039; comes from your mind, not from what you wear. Girls in manga (Tomae from Vampire Doll for example) are almost always cute, kind, helpful, caring, friendly, lovely and laid back... and manga girls are the girliest girls of them all. I%26#039;m pretty much the opposite of that at the moment (not cute, unkind, uncaring etc...)
So, I%26#039;ve decided that to feel more comfortable in myself, I need to take a lesson from manga girls and become nicer and therefore more stereotypically feminine. But how do you change your whole attitude and mindset like that? Can anyone give me any help or advice? Thanks :)|||I can tell from your well-articulated question that you are a very intelligent and thoughtful person. Use the gifts that you already have to make yourself into whatever you want to be. You don%26#039;t have to be a character in a book or magazine, you simply need to be yourself. When someone asks you to do something with or for them, respond with thoughtful honesty. Don%26#039;t attempt to be mean or kind in particular... just be human and fair.
If you allow yourself to accept yourself as you are right now, you will understand what I mean. Someone who knows who they are and what they stand for will instinctively understand that they deserve to be treated with kindness. A person with healthy self-esteem will also respond to others with likewise compassion and understanding. Work on yourself first and the rest will come.
Hope this helps.|||I can actually really relate to this.
Well let me put it this way.
I used to be a tomboy when I was younger. Im 15 now. I had all the guy friends and whatnot. I was even into the anime stuff. But actually as the years passed I became more interested with other things. Im not saying im 100% girly. Im better than I was though. Don%26#039;t take after a character or whatever. Take after yourself and go with what your mind, heart and soul tells you.
Do whatever you want and thats exactly what makes you, you.
How do you change one's impression on you?
I have two cases.
Case 1: You newly met someone, and you were pretty awkward and shy around him/her. Now he/she gets that first impression, but in reality, you were just sleepy and that is why that happened. You really are an outgoing person. How do you let the other person know that?
Case 2: You%26#039;ve been hanging out with someone for a year already, and for that year you were a loser and a brat. Suddenly, you want to change your attitude, and slowly you did. In that person%26#039;s mind though, it is set that you are a loser and a brat and there is no more space in his mind for your real attitude now. Whenever he/she sees you, he sees a loser and a brat. How do you change the way he/she sees you, so that you can get a true friend in him/her?|||actually there are different ways to change one%26#039;s impression on you since we all are different persons and we all have different attitudes.. but one thing is for sure.. try to prove to that person that you really are not what he/she thinks.. of course, this would involve doing things to make that person know who you really are..
* as they say : %26quot;to achieve something you%26#039;ve never had.. you must do something you%26#039;ve never done before..%26quot;
so dude.. take that extra mile.. and take away that negative impression they had of you.|||Just act how you want them to see you as.|||actions speak louder than words. just time should proove it. be steady in your actions, and he/she should notice that.
if not screw them!|||You can never change a first impression. You can only hope that if it was the wrong one that you%26#039;ll have the opportunity to change the other person%26#039;s mind. Or to run them over with your car if the opportunity arises. Whatever works for you.|||You shouldn%26#039;t be concentrating on what you can do to change other people%26#039;s impressions of you. You should be working on being the best person you can be to yourself and to others. If you become that then they will notice without any effort from you.|||Don%26#039;t act a part, be it!|||Just be yourself, if he doesn%26#039;t appreciate you some other person will.
Case 1: You newly met someone, and you were pretty awkward and shy around him/her. Now he/she gets that first impression, but in reality, you were just sleepy and that is why that happened. You really are an outgoing person. How do you let the other person know that?
Case 2: You%26#039;ve been hanging out with someone for a year already, and for that year you were a loser and a brat. Suddenly, you want to change your attitude, and slowly you did. In that person%26#039;s mind though, it is set that you are a loser and a brat and there is no more space in his mind for your real attitude now. Whenever he/she sees you, he sees a loser and a brat. How do you change the way he/she sees you, so that you can get a true friend in him/her?|||actually there are different ways to change one%26#039;s impression on you since we all are different persons and we all have different attitudes.. but one thing is for sure.. try to prove to that person that you really are not what he/she thinks.. of course, this would involve doing things to make that person know who you really are..
* as they say : %26quot;to achieve something you%26#039;ve never had.. you must do something you%26#039;ve never done before..%26quot;
so dude.. take that extra mile.. and take away that negative impression they had of you.|||Just act how you want them to see you as.|||actions speak louder than words. just time should proove it. be steady in your actions, and he/she should notice that.
if not screw them!|||You can never change a first impression. You can only hope that if it was the wrong one that you%26#039;ll have the opportunity to change the other person%26#039;s mind. Or to run them over with your car if the opportunity arises. Whatever works for you.|||You shouldn%26#039;t be concentrating on what you can do to change other people%26#039;s impressions of you. You should be working on being the best person you can be to yourself and to others. If you become that then they will notice without any effort from you.|||Don%26#039;t act a part, be it!|||Just be yourself, if he doesn%26#039;t appreciate you some other person will.
How could a person change his or her her body language from negative to positive?
The reason i%26#039;m asking is personal but it seems you can change your look%26#039;s your attitude but how do you change your body language. .It%26#039;s a dead give away of your past.|||As Sullenmoo said, educate yourself on what certain actions mean.
For example. If you are talking to someone and they have their arms crossed, that generally means they are closed to any ideas put forward.
Or if you are in a meeting and someone is leaning back in their chair that means that they are not interested in what you are saying.
If however someone is leaning back in their chair, has their hands behind their head and feet on the table, their body is saying that they are a superior person and they think they are better than you.
If someone doesn%26#039;t look you in the eye when you are speaking to them, they have something to hide. Or if they are looking around the room, that means they are not interested, and you certainly don%26#039;t have their full attention.
If someone is leaning forward in their chair that means they are interested.
If their hands are flat on the table, then they are open to new ideas.
If someone has a firm handshake, that means they have a positive attitude. Likewise if they have a weak handshake, then their attitude is negative.
Just knowing these small things can help you to conduct yourself better during any conversation or meeting.
Knowing these simple body language definitions can also be a big help if you are trying to train someone. Cause then you can know if they are really interested or if you need to change your tactics to make them interested.
Hope it helps.|||pilates, yoga, personal trainer... can really help change your posture and your body presentation. the key is to be consistent...|||Have you ever tried smiling?|||don%26#039;t cross your arms as much, don%26#039;t lean to one side or another.|||If you REALLY changed your attitude, all else would fall into place.|||take acting classes or having a split personally.|||Put on a big smile where ever you go, and people will read you as a happy person. I%26#039;ve seen this work very easily. People don%26#039;t care how you really feel inside as long as you have that smile on your face. Then all of a sudden your seen as a positive person. It%26#039;s stupid, but it works. Thats why so many evil females who are seen as angels is so interesting. They smile that cheesy grin all the time knowing people will think they%26#039;re so innocent and cute because of it When behind closed doors, they treat their boyfriends like trash, and sh*t talk against they%26#039;re so-called firends.
Whats funny is, you can be the most positive person on Earth, but if your not smiling, and you naturally have a slightly gloomy face, people will complain and say you have problems. We live in a childish society.|||Educating yourself about body language and what each simple gesture means is a good start. once you figure out what you are conveying you can then take actions to change what you are telling people by the way you stand, cross your arms, sit, move, change your face etc.
I have listed a link below for you to referance. Many times we don%26#039;t realize the simple %26quot;tells%26quot; we give off day to day with how we stand and look at people and so on. By finding out what each gesture means you can change which ones you use and thus present yourself in a better manner. Hope that helps.
~P~|||smile more often and think positive thoughts|||I believe this question would be better asked on your hand and knees calling out to GOD. He can help you change.|||I agree with Marie...Yoga Definitely
Pilate I have to try that...mind over matter ... you have to exercise ya own thinking work out walking It a good ! Smiling works !Body language Speak volume!|||You cant change that you can only accept the past and move on. I wish you well!!|||Research all that you can find on body language and then just practice what you have learned and want to convey. You will not always be convincing unless you practice a little attitude adjustment to go with it. Set a series of small goals that you would like to achieve and then go after them. When you learn that you can achieve what you want, then natural self confidence will show. Good luck.|||Be aware of your actions, study your self and your emotional states.
Body Language is the outward expression of your emotions. Think confident and you will show confidence, think positive and show positive. It is that easy.|||NLP training. Controlling your mind with it%26#039;s help and after learning using it to controll other%26#039;s.|||it would be a conscious effort that would drain you emotionally in a very short time. the best way is to get help for self confidence and perhaps read up on positive affirmations.
the best way to change is not to create a facade but to change your persona. less negativity and more positivity. sounds hard? only you (or the person) can do it. sooner or later the fake gestures will not be enough to mask the real person.
For example. If you are talking to someone and they have their arms crossed, that generally means they are closed to any ideas put forward.
Or if you are in a meeting and someone is leaning back in their chair that means that they are not interested in what you are saying.
If however someone is leaning back in their chair, has their hands behind their head and feet on the table, their body is saying that they are a superior person and they think they are better than you.
If someone doesn%26#039;t look you in the eye when you are speaking to them, they have something to hide. Or if they are looking around the room, that means they are not interested, and you certainly don%26#039;t have their full attention.
If someone is leaning forward in their chair that means they are interested.
If their hands are flat on the table, then they are open to new ideas.
If someone has a firm handshake, that means they have a positive attitude. Likewise if they have a weak handshake, then their attitude is negative.
Just knowing these small things can help you to conduct yourself better during any conversation or meeting.
Knowing these simple body language definitions can also be a big help if you are trying to train someone. Cause then you can know if they are really interested or if you need to change your tactics to make them interested.
Hope it helps.|||pilates, yoga, personal trainer... can really help change your posture and your body presentation. the key is to be consistent...|||Have you ever tried smiling?|||don%26#039;t cross your arms as much, don%26#039;t lean to one side or another.|||If you REALLY changed your attitude, all else would fall into place.|||take acting classes or having a split personally.|||Put on a big smile where ever you go, and people will read you as a happy person. I%26#039;ve seen this work very easily. People don%26#039;t care how you really feel inside as long as you have that smile on your face. Then all of a sudden your seen as a positive person. It%26#039;s stupid, but it works. Thats why so many evil females who are seen as angels is so interesting. They smile that cheesy grin all the time knowing people will think they%26#039;re so innocent and cute because of it When behind closed doors, they treat their boyfriends like trash, and sh*t talk against they%26#039;re so-called firends.
Whats funny is, you can be the most positive person on Earth, but if your not smiling, and you naturally have a slightly gloomy face, people will complain and say you have problems. We live in a childish society.|||Educating yourself about body language and what each simple gesture means is a good start. once you figure out what you are conveying you can then take actions to change what you are telling people by the way you stand, cross your arms, sit, move, change your face etc.
I have listed a link below for you to referance. Many times we don%26#039;t realize the simple %26quot;tells%26quot; we give off day to day with how we stand and look at people and so on. By finding out what each gesture means you can change which ones you use and thus present yourself in a better manner. Hope that helps.
~P~|||smile more often and think positive thoughts|||I believe this question would be better asked on your hand and knees calling out to GOD. He can help you change.|||I agree with Marie...Yoga Definitely
Pilate I have to try that...mind over matter ... you have to exercise ya own thinking work out walking It a good ! Smiling works !Body language Speak volume!|||You cant change that you can only accept the past and move on. I wish you well!!|||Research all that you can find on body language and then just practice what you have learned and want to convey. You will not always be convincing unless you practice a little attitude adjustment to go with it. Set a series of small goals that you would like to achieve and then go after them. When you learn that you can achieve what you want, then natural self confidence will show. Good luck.|||Be aware of your actions, study your self and your emotional states.
Body Language is the outward expression of your emotions. Think confident and you will show confidence, think positive and show positive. It is that easy.|||NLP training. Controlling your mind with it%26#039;s help and after learning using it to controll other%26#039;s.|||it would be a conscious effort that would drain you emotionally in a very short time. the best way is to get help for self confidence and perhaps read up on positive affirmations.
the best way to change is not to create a facade but to change your persona. less negativity and more positivity. sounds hard? only you (or the person) can do it. sooner or later the fake gestures will not be enough to mask the real person.
Would you like to change peoples attitudes towards you ? if so in whatway?
what leads to these attitudes ? how should you approach peoples in your demand for change ? how can you change your attitudes to help solve problems ? how can you find remidies which are acceptable to you ?|||No -- I don%26#039;t care about their attitudes towards me.|||Understand me, love me, know that I love you|||tell me what i need to know. don%26#039;t judge me by my cover, don%26#039;t put too much pressure on me.|||No i would not let them think what they want to I know the truth and thats all that matters. They don%26#039;t help me or pay my bills or take care of me so what do I care. People are people and they love drama|||seems like you%26#039;re really into attitude stuff.me too?
well you gotto change you habits like giving a genuine smile to people .
remember people%26#039;s full name and call them by that everytime you meet them
compliment everyone sincerely.but no flattery.
don%26#039;t hurt people if youi%26#039;re into politics or business specially
put servic first and money follows you
do some social service|||Dr. McGraw said: %26quot;You teach people how to treat you.%26quot; -- try to figure this out and see if makes sense to you...
well you gotto change you habits like giving a genuine smile to people .
remember people%26#039;s full name and call them by that everytime you meet them
compliment everyone sincerely.but no flattery.
don%26#039;t hurt people if youi%26#039;re into politics or business specially
put servic first and money follows you
do some social service|||Dr. McGraw said: %26quot;You teach people how to treat you.%26quot; -- try to figure this out and see if makes sense to you...
How has R&S yahoo changed your attitude and thoughts?
in my visits to the American Christian section, I have made so many friends and it has made me a loving and forgiving christian. I see now that atheists are humans too, and they deserve love and forgiveness. I pray for all of you evey night!
no thankyou necessary!!! (((R%26amp;S)))|||Please don%26#039;t pray for me. Thanks.|||i%26#039;ve become more staunch in my conviction that god doesn%26#039;t exist.|||Thank you sweetie!!!
I bought some handcuffs for us tonight!!!! You had mentioned wanting to try them sometime!|||Frankly not at all. Until I discovered you have friends. Now, I am in a state of shock of which I may never recover.|||Where%26#039;s the American Christian section? Am I missing something?|||I always used to think dirty, sexy emails were silly.|||After a while I realised I don%26#039;t want your nudes.
Just kidding. Send me some. ASAP.|||Yes. I tend to randomly punch more Christians these days.|||It%26#039;s definitely made me think of a lot of different things.|||I realized how lucky I am to be surrounded by reasonable Christians in real life. They%26#039;re the best Christian pals I could hope for.|||it has showed me that christians like you are as evil as Satan
and that%26#039;s y i will never join christianity in case i turn into a devil like you|||I am constantly presented with the levels of ignorance prevalent in modern American society. Atheists thinking they have a valid point and that they can defend those points with any level of veracity. Christians doing the same. The two mistakenly under the impression that they are different in any way other than name alone. So, yes, I am less and less impressed with what qualifies as intelligence albeit self-proclaimed generally in modern society.|||It has shown me how shallow and immature people can be
It has also shown me there is a remnant and that gives me joy|||I%26#039;ve become stronger in my conviction that there is no god, and every time i see a religious person spew hatred I am more and more certain of my position.|||The analysis isn%26#039;t in yet.|||Oh, let me thank you anyway! It%26#039;s precisely because of people like you that I am even more resolved in my Judaism. It%26#039;s precisely because of people like you that has convinced me that I want nothing to do with Christianity.
no thankyou necessary!!! (((R%26amp;S)))|||Please don%26#039;t pray for me. Thanks.|||i%26#039;ve become more staunch in my conviction that god doesn%26#039;t exist.|||Thank you sweetie!!!
I bought some handcuffs for us tonight!!!! You had mentioned wanting to try them sometime!|||Frankly not at all. Until I discovered you have friends. Now, I am in a state of shock of which I may never recover.|||Where%26#039;s the American Christian section? Am I missing something?|||I always used to think dirty, sexy emails were silly.|||After a while I realised I don%26#039;t want your nudes.
Just kidding. Send me some. ASAP.|||Yes. I tend to randomly punch more Christians these days.|||It%26#039;s definitely made me think of a lot of different things.|||I realized how lucky I am to be surrounded by reasonable Christians in real life. They%26#039;re the best Christian pals I could hope for.|||it has showed me that christians like you are as evil as Satan
and that%26#039;s y i will never join christianity in case i turn into a devil like you|||I am constantly presented with the levels of ignorance prevalent in modern American society. Atheists thinking they have a valid point and that they can defend those points with any level of veracity. Christians doing the same. The two mistakenly under the impression that they are different in any way other than name alone. So, yes, I am less and less impressed with what qualifies as intelligence albeit self-proclaimed generally in modern society.|||It has shown me how shallow and immature people can be
It has also shown me there is a remnant and that gives me joy|||I%26#039;ve become stronger in my conviction that there is no god, and every time i see a religious person spew hatred I am more and more certain of my position.|||The analysis isn%26#039;t in yet.|||Oh, let me thank you anyway! It%26#039;s precisely because of people like you that I am even more resolved in my Judaism. It%26#039;s precisely because of people like you that has convinced me that I want nothing to do with Christianity.
Is it possible, really, to change your lifestyle and attitude?
People say you have to change your lifestyle and eating habits to become the fitter and slimmer person you want to be. And so you don%26#039;t go back to eating all the wrong stuff again. How do you do this? How do you change your lifestyle when you%26#039;re so used to eating pizza, chocolate, crisps? How can you ignore the cravings you get after your body is used to getting them? How do you lose all the weight and then keep it off by not going back?
Please help, I want to change my lifstyle and attitude, lose the weight and NEVER go back. I just want some pointers. My dream is to play football again, go hiking and be able to run without looking stupid! lol. Any information you have will be helpful. Thanks in advance for your time.|||It takes willpower and determination.
You have to really want it.
But you have to also realise that the longer yuo stick with it, the easier it gets.
I changed my lifestyle in September when I started to feel pains in my chest.
This scared me. I thought I was going to die.
I knew then that if I didn%26#039;t change my ways immediately, I would die.
And I knew exactly what I had to do to avoid dying.
I changed my lifestyle overnight. Started eating healthy. Threw my chip pan in the bin and bought a steamer and George Foreman grill. I stocked up on fresh veg, fish and salads.
I took up a hobby that got me some execise, cycling.
For the first month, it was hard, and the cravings were difficult to fight, but I knew my life depended on my being strong, so that got me through it.
After the first month, it became easier. And every week after that it got a easier still. Now, I don%26#039;t feel the cravings at all, and I actually prefer the healthy food over the nasty old greasy fried crap.
You can try a lot of tricks to make things easier.
If you%26#039;re feeling empty, hollow or hungry, drink a big glass of water. This fills you up and makes you feel bloated.
If you%26#039;re craving the actual act of eating, have celery, carrots, fruit or something like that.
If you%26#039;re craving the flavour of pizza or your favourite junk food, there%26#039;s a trick you can use to fool yourself.
It sounds ridiculous, but it really does work.
Get a piece of celery or carrot or something like that, and get a picture of the food you%26#039;re craving.
Now concentrate on that picture and think about what it tastes like.
Now, hold your nose and eat the celery while holding your nostrils pinched shut.
By pinching your nose shut, you suppress your olfactory receptors ability to actually determine the flavour of the food you%26#039;re eating.
By thinking about the flavour you want while chewing, you fool your brain into replacing the missing flavour with the one you%26#039;re thinking about.
It really does work.
Try some mental mind games.
For example, every time you hear your stomach rumbling, visualise a big yellow JCB inside your belly, with the digger part of it scooping out big bucketloads of fat from your belly.
Eventually, you%26#039;ll start to crave the stomach rumbling sensations more than the craving for food.
Lastly, get a photo album and a digital or polaroid camera. Any sort of camera that allows you to make photos without anyone else seeing them.
One day a week, undress right down to your underwear and take a photo of yourself.
Now put that photo in your album and put the date beside it.
Do this at the same time every week, and after a few months you%26#039;ll be able to open the photo album and actually see your body improving in shape before your very eyes.
This is a huge incentive to keep up the good hard work.
Keep the photo album private if you%26#039;re shy or embarassed about letting others see you in your undies. After all, it%26#039;s got nothing to do with anyone else. It%26#039;s for your eyes only.
Most importantly, keep in a positive frame of mind, and try to keep your mind active. If you%26#039;re busy and doing stuff, you%26#039;ll be less likely to start thinking about snacking.
Good luck with it.|||I used to be hooked on fast food, soda, and chocolate. I found SparkPeople.com and it has helped me a lot. The entire website is dedicated to helping you make a lifestyle change. I haven%26#039;t had fast food or soda in quite some time now and once a week I allow myself to have a small piece of chocolate so that I don%26#039;t feel like I%26#039;m going through withdrawal. Good luck and I hope this helps!|||I did it. I was the biggest junk food junkie around. I ate fast foods for all 3 meals, and ate sweets as snacks in between.
It took about 2 weeks of forcing myself to change, before it started to become natural to me to eat right.
Just stick to it. After a while, it will become part of %26quot;the new you%26quot;.
Good Luck!!!|||Well cravings are caused by two factors.... What our body wants and what our brain wants.... Like with smoking... The physical addiction to nicotine stops after only 48 hours... After the first 2 days its all habit from there.... (remeber that you smokers who can%26#039;t quit... It really is all in your head....) The same goes for food... Except on a slightely more complex level....
You%26#039;re best way is to target what tastes you like and find a healthy alternative... If you like sweets eat more fruits... Fruits have a lot of natural sugars in them.... Keep in mind.... Moderation.....
Try to limit what you buy at the grocerry store... Out of house, out of body.... If you want cookies bake your own... It%26#039;s a little healthier and if you actually have to work to make them you are less liekyl to impulsively eat them....
Try some pilates also... Its a great core workout program that can be extended to most of your body... It%26#039;s easy to do and it can be tailored to different levels....
To help with this give yourself an indulgance.... Allow yourself that bowl of ice cream after the first 10 pounds.... Little treats along the way help motivation...
Keep in mind that the weight wont just fall of after the first couple weeks... Sometimes you will experience a lrapid weight loss... This is mainly water.... After that its a little slower, but don%26#039;t get discouraged.... While dropping fat your body will be building areas of muscle.... It%26#039;s almost a 1 step back 2 steps forward process... Yuo%26#039;ll get there eventually....
Take a picture of what you look like now.... Circle your problem areas.... Scan it and pirnt it out so you have a large copy... Put it on your fridge... or in your pantry.... Next time you want something you know you shouldn%26#039;t eat look at the picture.....
Plan your meals.... It%26#039;s easier to calory watch if you plan a head....
Do positive affirmations.... %26quot;I am skinny...%26quot; %26quot;I can see the piunds dropping off....%26quot;
Motivation is the key... and Keeping it going....
ADDENDUM: Keep a progress diary.... Write down your weight, measurements, current diet.... so on and so forth....
Then write down a workout routien the you%26#039;ll follow... Write down your grocery lists.... See what you%26#039;re eating.... Every other week weigh yourself.... Write it down..... then whenever you feel discouraged you can look back and say... hey... I lost 23 pounds... I didn%26#039;t realize that.... Put some positive mantras in there....|||Yes, it is possible. You%26#039;ve just got to want it.
When it became apparent that there was hereditory heart disease in my family, I changed my diet to drastically reduce my fat intake and ensured I exercised in a way to benefit my heart.
This is now my normal lifestyle and has been for nearly 20 years, the notion that it is something different or a change only lasts a short time while you are in transition. Cravings too are only short term, with good nutrition they can be minimised. Like I said after a while it stops being something different and just becomes what is normal.
From small acorns do great oaks grow... and similar sayings. A little at a time will get you well on the way to a change for the better. I threw away my frying and chip pans. Everything gets grilled now. That in itself can make a big difference to your overall fat and calorie intake.
The only thing stopping you from getting what you want is you! Good luck!|||I would suggest you to read this article about Mediterranean eating lifestyle.
www best-fat-burn-strategies com/Mediterranean_diet
As well as to read about natural foods (please, don%26#039;t mention this is under the topic detox diets)
www best-fat-burn-strategies com/detox_diets
I do believe this will help you. And just a remark: pizza, chocolate, crisps are not bad. You just have to eat them not every day or .. week.
Very good question!|||Of course it%26#039;s possible. Many people do it. But many more can%26#039;t because they cannot muster the inner strength -- the commitment, determination, and will-power necessary to change. The only one who can effect change in you is you. Many people are in a big hurry, and when they don%26#039;t see rapid change they assume they%26#039;re failing and then give up. Build yourself a lifetime strategy of healthy eating and exercise and you can do it!
You needn%26#039;t do it alone, and there are lots of resources around to help and support you. Look into Weight Watchers or a similar program that will give you tools, resources, and support.
And remember: winning the challenge of permanent weight loss and a healthy lifestyle is a long-term proposition. The prize of success always goes to the tortoise, never the hare.|||Okay - start slow, walk around the block every day. Focus on losing a LB a week, more then that is just water and will come back fast.
Look at the reason why your life style effects your eating habits. - Some times is it psychological. Depression will keep you out of shape. Eating and inactivity can be caused by emotional, if you don%26#039;t want to get out of bed or go for a walk because you %26quot;feel%26quot; tired, it actually maybe that you actually feel %26quot;down%26quot; Bottom line love yourself and you%26#039;ll take care of your self.
Don%26#039;t hang with negative people. if you must don%26#039;t let them bring you down.
Listen to music that makes you feel good. Read inspirational books.
If you commit to cut out soft drinks and chocolate for a week and drink a lot of water the taste of a Coke will make you sick. You can actually taste all the harmful chemicals and you feel it roting your teeth. Same thing with McDonald%26#039;s, you can feel the grease going down you chest.
- You have to listen to your body.
good luck|||If you really wanna be realistic then you can lose 4-5 lbs a week. Losing 30lbs should take roughly 6weeks. Simply lower your eating intake by 1/3 and eat as soon as you get hungry. This will increase your body%26#039;s metabolism and help to burn that excess energy instead of storing it as fat.
(Most importantly avoid light snacks in-between meals as this will increase your food intake without you even realising it).
Also some exercises, nothing too drastic. Just 20 sit-ups in the morning, 20 sit-ups at night before bed. 10 push-ups morning and night and some extended brisk walks up-to 30minutes a day (a slightly hilly terrain is ideal), and a 15min jog only once a week. (and increase the number of walks/sit-ups etc as you get used to them).
Follow this regime and your 30 lbs should drop within 6 weeks. And the best thing of all you really don%26#039;t have to drastically change your diet or even exert yourself during exercise. And can actually be enjoyable. With this method, your not actually dieting, it;%26#039;s more of a lifestyle change.
p.s walking on hilly terrain, at steep angles is great, probably the best from of buttock exercise, they get real firm!
And Drink plenty of water - preferably 5litres on average, this will help replenish your body, rehydrate your skin - it will have a healthy glow and also give you a more accurate reading of your weight when you weigh yourself as the initial weight loss is due to a lack of water retention.
Please help, I want to change my lifstyle and attitude, lose the weight and NEVER go back. I just want some pointers. My dream is to play football again, go hiking and be able to run without looking stupid! lol. Any information you have will be helpful. Thanks in advance for your time.|||It takes willpower and determination.
You have to really want it.
But you have to also realise that the longer yuo stick with it, the easier it gets.
I changed my lifestyle in September when I started to feel pains in my chest.
This scared me. I thought I was going to die.
I knew then that if I didn%26#039;t change my ways immediately, I would die.
And I knew exactly what I had to do to avoid dying.
I changed my lifestyle overnight. Started eating healthy. Threw my chip pan in the bin and bought a steamer and George Foreman grill. I stocked up on fresh veg, fish and salads.
I took up a hobby that got me some execise, cycling.
For the first month, it was hard, and the cravings were difficult to fight, but I knew my life depended on my being strong, so that got me through it.
After the first month, it became easier. And every week after that it got a easier still. Now, I don%26#039;t feel the cravings at all, and I actually prefer the healthy food over the nasty old greasy fried crap.
You can try a lot of tricks to make things easier.
If you%26#039;re feeling empty, hollow or hungry, drink a big glass of water. This fills you up and makes you feel bloated.
If you%26#039;re craving the actual act of eating, have celery, carrots, fruit or something like that.
If you%26#039;re craving the flavour of pizza or your favourite junk food, there%26#039;s a trick you can use to fool yourself.
It sounds ridiculous, but it really does work.
Get a piece of celery or carrot or something like that, and get a picture of the food you%26#039;re craving.
Now concentrate on that picture and think about what it tastes like.
Now, hold your nose and eat the celery while holding your nostrils pinched shut.
By pinching your nose shut, you suppress your olfactory receptors ability to actually determine the flavour of the food you%26#039;re eating.
By thinking about the flavour you want while chewing, you fool your brain into replacing the missing flavour with the one you%26#039;re thinking about.
It really does work.
Try some mental mind games.
For example, every time you hear your stomach rumbling, visualise a big yellow JCB inside your belly, with the digger part of it scooping out big bucketloads of fat from your belly.
Eventually, you%26#039;ll start to crave the stomach rumbling sensations more than the craving for food.
Lastly, get a photo album and a digital or polaroid camera. Any sort of camera that allows you to make photos without anyone else seeing them.
One day a week, undress right down to your underwear and take a photo of yourself.
Now put that photo in your album and put the date beside it.
Do this at the same time every week, and after a few months you%26#039;ll be able to open the photo album and actually see your body improving in shape before your very eyes.
This is a huge incentive to keep up the good hard work.
Keep the photo album private if you%26#039;re shy or embarassed about letting others see you in your undies. After all, it%26#039;s got nothing to do with anyone else. It%26#039;s for your eyes only.
Most importantly, keep in a positive frame of mind, and try to keep your mind active. If you%26#039;re busy and doing stuff, you%26#039;ll be less likely to start thinking about snacking.
Good luck with it.|||I used to be hooked on fast food, soda, and chocolate. I found SparkPeople.com and it has helped me a lot. The entire website is dedicated to helping you make a lifestyle change. I haven%26#039;t had fast food or soda in quite some time now and once a week I allow myself to have a small piece of chocolate so that I don%26#039;t feel like I%26#039;m going through withdrawal. Good luck and I hope this helps!|||I did it. I was the biggest junk food junkie around. I ate fast foods for all 3 meals, and ate sweets as snacks in between.
It took about 2 weeks of forcing myself to change, before it started to become natural to me to eat right.
Just stick to it. After a while, it will become part of %26quot;the new you%26quot;.
Good Luck!!!|||Well cravings are caused by two factors.... What our body wants and what our brain wants.... Like with smoking... The physical addiction to nicotine stops after only 48 hours... After the first 2 days its all habit from there.... (remeber that you smokers who can%26#039;t quit... It really is all in your head....) The same goes for food... Except on a slightely more complex level....
You%26#039;re best way is to target what tastes you like and find a healthy alternative... If you like sweets eat more fruits... Fruits have a lot of natural sugars in them.... Keep in mind.... Moderation.....
Try to limit what you buy at the grocerry store... Out of house, out of body.... If you want cookies bake your own... It%26#039;s a little healthier and if you actually have to work to make them you are less liekyl to impulsively eat them....
Try some pilates also... Its a great core workout program that can be extended to most of your body... It%26#039;s easy to do and it can be tailored to different levels....
To help with this give yourself an indulgance.... Allow yourself that bowl of ice cream after the first 10 pounds.... Little treats along the way help motivation...
Keep in mind that the weight wont just fall of after the first couple weeks... Sometimes you will experience a lrapid weight loss... This is mainly water.... After that its a little slower, but don%26#039;t get discouraged.... While dropping fat your body will be building areas of muscle.... It%26#039;s almost a 1 step back 2 steps forward process... Yuo%26#039;ll get there eventually....
Take a picture of what you look like now.... Circle your problem areas.... Scan it and pirnt it out so you have a large copy... Put it on your fridge... or in your pantry.... Next time you want something you know you shouldn%26#039;t eat look at the picture.....
Plan your meals.... It%26#039;s easier to calory watch if you plan a head....
Do positive affirmations.... %26quot;I am skinny...%26quot; %26quot;I can see the piunds dropping off....%26quot;
Motivation is the key... and Keeping it going....
ADDENDUM: Keep a progress diary.... Write down your weight, measurements, current diet.... so on and so forth....
Then write down a workout routien the you%26#039;ll follow... Write down your grocery lists.... See what you%26#039;re eating.... Every other week weigh yourself.... Write it down..... then whenever you feel discouraged you can look back and say... hey... I lost 23 pounds... I didn%26#039;t realize that.... Put some positive mantras in there....|||Yes, it is possible. You%26#039;ve just got to want it.
When it became apparent that there was hereditory heart disease in my family, I changed my diet to drastically reduce my fat intake and ensured I exercised in a way to benefit my heart.
This is now my normal lifestyle and has been for nearly 20 years, the notion that it is something different or a change only lasts a short time while you are in transition. Cravings too are only short term, with good nutrition they can be minimised. Like I said after a while it stops being something different and just becomes what is normal.
From small acorns do great oaks grow... and similar sayings. A little at a time will get you well on the way to a change for the better. I threw away my frying and chip pans. Everything gets grilled now. That in itself can make a big difference to your overall fat and calorie intake.
The only thing stopping you from getting what you want is you! Good luck!|||I would suggest you to read this article about Mediterranean eating lifestyle.
www best-fat-burn-strategies com/Mediterranean_diet
As well as to read about natural foods (please, don%26#039;t mention this is under the topic detox diets)
www best-fat-burn-strategies com/detox_diets
I do believe this will help you. And just a remark: pizza, chocolate, crisps are not bad. You just have to eat them not every day or .. week.
Very good question!|||Of course it%26#039;s possible. Many people do it. But many more can%26#039;t because they cannot muster the inner strength -- the commitment, determination, and will-power necessary to change. The only one who can effect change in you is you. Many people are in a big hurry, and when they don%26#039;t see rapid change they assume they%26#039;re failing and then give up. Build yourself a lifetime strategy of healthy eating and exercise and you can do it!
You needn%26#039;t do it alone, and there are lots of resources around to help and support you. Look into Weight Watchers or a similar program that will give you tools, resources, and support.
And remember: winning the challenge of permanent weight loss and a healthy lifestyle is a long-term proposition. The prize of success always goes to the tortoise, never the hare.|||Okay - start slow, walk around the block every day. Focus on losing a LB a week, more then that is just water and will come back fast.
Look at the reason why your life style effects your eating habits. - Some times is it psychological. Depression will keep you out of shape. Eating and inactivity can be caused by emotional, if you don%26#039;t want to get out of bed or go for a walk because you %26quot;feel%26quot; tired, it actually maybe that you actually feel %26quot;down%26quot; Bottom line love yourself and you%26#039;ll take care of your self.
Don%26#039;t hang with negative people. if you must don%26#039;t let them bring you down.
Listen to music that makes you feel good. Read inspirational books.
If you commit to cut out soft drinks and chocolate for a week and drink a lot of water the taste of a Coke will make you sick. You can actually taste all the harmful chemicals and you feel it roting your teeth. Same thing with McDonald%26#039;s, you can feel the grease going down you chest.
- You have to listen to your body.
good luck|||If you really wanna be realistic then you can lose 4-5 lbs a week. Losing 30lbs should take roughly 6weeks. Simply lower your eating intake by 1/3 and eat as soon as you get hungry. This will increase your body%26#039;s metabolism and help to burn that excess energy instead of storing it as fat.
(Most importantly avoid light snacks in-between meals as this will increase your food intake without you even realising it).
Also some exercises, nothing too drastic. Just 20 sit-ups in the morning, 20 sit-ups at night before bed. 10 push-ups morning and night and some extended brisk walks up-to 30minutes a day (a slightly hilly terrain is ideal), and a 15min jog only once a week. (and increase the number of walks/sit-ups etc as you get used to them).
Follow this regime and your 30 lbs should drop within 6 weeks. And the best thing of all you really don%26#039;t have to drastically change your diet or even exert yourself during exercise. And can actually be enjoyable. With this method, your not actually dieting, it;%26#039;s more of a lifestyle change.
p.s walking on hilly terrain, at steep angles is great, probably the best from of buttock exercise, they get real firm!
And Drink plenty of water - preferably 5litres on average, this will help replenish your body, rehydrate your skin - it will have a healthy glow and also give you a more accurate reading of your weight when you weigh yourself as the initial weight loss is due to a lack of water retention.
How can people dare suggest that I change my attitude?
People are always telling me: %26quot;You just need to change your attitude and look at the good things in life.%26quot;
A 5 year old girl I know was raped, disemboweled and hanged will still alive. This was done by her own horribly abusive parents. She died totally alone never knowing love or anything good. At her enormous school and classroom, only the attendance board knew her name. When she died it was in the local news for a few days. People pretended to grieve but a few days later it was though it never happened. People forgot all about it a few days later.
The people of that community are enjoying their happy attitudes right now. It%26#039;s just another beautiful day for them, there was never a little girl named Emily.
I%26#039;m the only one who still visits her grave and I am a complete stranger.
Why in ****%26#039;s name should I choose to be happy and satisfied when injustice lives so abundantly?|||because darling .... life does go on
while I think it is very honourable and lovely of you to keep this little girls memory alive....
there are wonderful things in life
and keeping a hold of that anger wont do anything but add to the anger of the world
use it !!
join a charity for abused children
get productive
make a difference
(((((HUGS))))))
edit
people dont only do good just to feel good about themself
people do good because they are passionate about things as you are .... but they turn this into something resourceful and helpful|||Get a purpose...
Find him, and destroy him.
Very slowly.|||Because it will eat you alive. The way you feel today will be who you are tomorrow. I%26#039;m sure Emily would rather have a positive person remember her rather than an angry malcontent. It%26#039;s good that you want to remember her, but don%26#039;t let it destroy you. If you do, her parents will have killed you too.|||Believe me, I know how you feel. But you cannot take the blame for the world. It will only lead to your own ruin.|||I%26#039;m sorry, that%26#039;s horrible.
Work to actively change things for other little girls-- there are lots of things that can be done to improve the world that are only possible if everyone makes an effort. I%26#039;m sure it could be a cathartic experience for you, as well as genuinely bettering someone else%26#039;s life.
---
EDIT:
I don%26#039;t think everyone but you who does good things, only does them for selfish reasons. I realize you%26#039;re angry, but stop being so self-righteous.
If you are working to actively change things, you%26#039;re doing the best you can do. I%26#039;ve also seen and worked with children who had their arms macheted off by government sponsered terrorist groups in the Sudan, after watching their parents raped, maimed and mounted on pikes.
I%26#039;ve peer-counselled a girl who worked in a sweatshop wearing a diaper half her life and then was sold by her father as a sex slave-- she lived in one room for 4 years and escaped on her own, and is now, like I did after I was raped, peer-counselling girls who have no one else to turn to.
It%26#039;s easy for people to have escapist attitudes and praise the lord for every goddamn thing when they have no idea, and don%26#039;t care to know, what%26#039;s going on in the rest of the world.
The rest of us are angry, hurting, frustrated and just trying to make it through the day like you are. I%26#039;m sorry you%26#039;re so resentful that I%26#039;ve maintained my ability to be happy at times and laugh while never giving up on the causes that are so dear to me. But, I%26#039;ve worked hard to be able to get through the day, and even enjoy it. I%26#039;m proud to be where I am now, because were I incapacitated by my pain, I would not only be hurt, but I would be USELESS.
---
Edit 2:
God is %26quot;better%26quot; than this world? He%26#039;s an omnipotent creator and he was somehow powerless to intervene on Emily%26#039;s behalf? You think so highly of a being you know is imaginary, yet think yourself to be the only decent person in this world. Yeah, that makes sense.
Somehow you%26#039;ve managed to surround yourself with reality, but ignore it. I have no sympathy for your bullshit attitude, stop trying to escape.|||There is no cosmic justice putting right all the wrongs. Humanity invented god to pretend there was, but you%26#039;ll notice all the wrongs get righted in the (non-existent) afterlife.
No, there%26#039;s just us
But I don%26#039;t see that as reason to be miserable. For every evil SOB like ones you mention there are some good, good people. The world isn%26#039;t all bleak and people are - in my experience - mostly worth spending time with.
You have one life and you can spend it contemplating the terrible injustices, or you can do something about it. Your call.|||bad stuff happens all the time. Horrible things that make you question all the things you believe. Sometimes they happen very close to home and sometimes you only hear about it on the news. Life isn%26#039;t fair and there is no such thing as real justice. But it%26#039;s no reason not to live YOUR life the best you can.|||Your anger will destroy you...that is why you must look on the bright side...my life has personally been a bit of a horror but I refuse to dwell on it...YOU are dwelling on the horror...and it is making you ill...it is not your responsibility to suffer for the sins of the world...unless of course you secretly enjoy doing just that...so..just as I thought..you do enjoy it...so have fun...|||Because nothing is forever and her pain is over. All thats left is to punish those who did it to her. Everyone needs to move on, honey.|||The world is an evil place.
You have no need to change your outlook. It is what it is--simply the effect of the things you have observed around you.
A person can only be so happy when pain and suffering is constantly among them...and I know how that feels.
You just have to hope that some day you can come to terms with the awful things that happen in this world. You%26#039;re not a superhero, and you can%26#039;t protect everyone.
However, the fact that you go to her grave and she was a complete stranger to you shows that you have an immense amount of compassion. In fact, I have great respect for you for that.
Life is a difficult concept to grasp at times. All we have is our world around us...and you just have to make the best of it.
I hope you find peace in your life very soon. I%26#039;ll be thinking of you. :)|||you have a beautiful heart|||~Beautifully and well said Pangel~|||Be sure they will be punished in the dayafter.
[3.196] Let it not deceive you that those who disbelieve go to and fro in the cities fearlessly.
[3.197] A brief enjoyment! then their abode is hell, and evil is the resting-place.|||You poor person! There is only one God. You should change your attitude! Be happy! God saved us from death. Here is a way to look at it. God puts us on the earth for only a short time..... so we should make the most of it! When our friends and family die it is always sad for us...... we just have to remember that she is with God and we will see her again if we follow God%26#039;s orders and remember: you should not be mad at God for what happened to Emily. I%26#039;ll pray for you. You know not what you are doing.|||Because your attitude will eventually destroy you. What you describe is terrible but our duty to the dead is to keep living and do all we can to make our part of the world better. This can only be done with love. Sorry for your pain but you must go on. Peace and God bless you.|||That%26#039;s horrible! I remember being that age. I can%26#039;t even begin to imagine being raised that way. Sweetie, you can%26#039;t give people a conscience. Most of them have one, and they haven%26#039;t forgotten her. This disturbs people so badly, they don%26#039;t want to think about it. It terrifies you for your own children. Everyone is so full of fear. We need to know our neighbors better. Maybe such as this can be avoided if we just knew our neighbors. I know it%26#039;s inconvenient and we don%26#039;t have much time for ourselves any more. That%26#039;s how these things happen. Some we can avoid and some we can%26#039;t. Getting angry at the others won%26#039;t help. Maybe you can direct your energies into starting some kind of program to make sure children don%26#039;t fall through the wide slots in the floor boards. Do something positive with your anger. Don%26#039;t judge the others so harshly. You don%26#039;t know where they are and how they are. Just like the little neighbor girl who was so hideously murdered.|||There are many who do good not to feel better about themselves but because it is the right thing. Because there are people like Emily whose very lives depend upon them doing good. AND THEIR JUSTICE DEPENDS UPON YOU AND ME.
I am going to dare to suggest that you change your attitude, not necessarily to see the good in life (at least not all the time). I am going to suggest that since you were touched so much by Emily and her trials, pain, and cruel untimely death that you ask yourself what would Emily want me to do? There are thousands and thousands of Emily%26#039;s in the world. While it may be to late for this precious one YOU can work to the best of your ability to make sure that not all end up with her fate (think if someone had been used their outrage over another child in this manner, Emily might not have met the end she did). Let her name be remembered through your actions, that her life and death changed something. Simply put the path your on helps no one, least of all Emily and those like her out there. Peter Maurin ( a monk and co founder of the Catholic worker) said We are God%26#039;s hands in the world and if YOU must be the change you wish to see in the world. Emily because she touched you is a part of you now. Will you let her die and be forgotten again inside of you?
EDIT: %26quot;then my wrath is the only part of me that there should be.%26quot;- - - -that was probably the mantra of Emily%26#039;s parents if you think about it. If you don%26#039;t do something different you run the risk of becoming something akin to them, not the same but something like that. What a slap in the face that would be to Emily.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QDm03Foq2鈥?/a>|||Actually, GOD does care. We, however, lose faith.
Mark 4:38 聽And he was in the hinder part of the ship, asleep on a pillow: and they awake him, and say unto him, Master, carest thou not that we perish?
It would help to read the whole story, otherwise, this verse alone will fill you with more hate.
I will pray for you because you are the only person who cared for her.
GOD bless|||The story is sad, however it happens every day in many countires throught out this world. Injustice happens not because of God%26#039;s failure, it happens because of humans who lack the courage to stand up and speak out.|||God was right there suffering with her when that was happening to her. She is peacefully asleep right now, free of pain, and when Christ returns, he will lovingly resurrect her into a new, physical, eternal body, in which death or pain will have no power. He will wipe all the tears from her eyes, and the things she suffered on this Earth will become a faded, distant memory. The joys of Heaven will be so great, she will not be able to remember what happened before. It will seem trivial by comparison.
My God is a God of justice and mercy. Tnose who did this barbaric act, unless they repent of their sins, will be punished and destroyed permanently.
Jesus told us, that, because of the stain of sin in this world, %26quot;We will have trouble%26quot;. That is why children suffer and injustice is rampant. It%26#039;s because of the sin condition in this world. But God has a plan. Two thousand years ago, He paid the ultimate sacrifice on our behalf so that we can get to Heaven. Satan hates this, because he knows his time is short, so he is doing his very best to corrupt humanity, and take as many humans with him as possible. He corrupted the girl%26#039;s parents and guided them in their actions. They had Free Will and chose to follow Satan instead of Christ. But very soon, Christ will return and destroy Satan and all traces of sin. I am looking forward to that day, because there will no longer be suffering, and all the junk that%26#039;s going on in the world today will come to an end. Until that time, we can expect to see more and more sin and conflict - God described it as labor pains just before a baby comes. The pain gets worse and worse, and then, when it%26#039;s at it%26#039;s worst, a beautiful baby comes, and the mother is overjoyed, and forgets about all the pain. That%26#039;s what it will be like when Christ returns.|||I am so incredibly sorry. I know what it%26#039;s like to be that disgusted and that angry over something like this. I%26#039;ve been there. The little girl who was raped and buried alive by her neighbor a few years ago in Florida was a friend of my family. I was wrecked afterward, and I was told often to change my attitude and try to see the positive. Every time I see her daddy, Mark, on television trying to get laws passed in her name, or that beast of a man, John Couey, who did it, I get physically ill remembering what that time was like. I have no advice to offer you about this. I can tell you that if you ever would just like to rant and vent, feel free to email or IM me anytime. I%26#039;m a good listener, and nothing you say will shock me. As I said, I%26#039;ve been there.|||I would never ask you to be happy or satisfied, but you my friend suffer from sensitivity. It is an affliction, the opposite of psychopathy. You feel rage toward the world because you are powerless over your inability to prevent the innocent from suffering.
May I suggest you take up a cause which you feel is worthwhile? Fight for child protection, or animal rights, or adult literacy; whatever. Something that lets you feel like even though the world is fkd, you are helping someone somewhere and making the tiniest difference.
That is what has worked for me. I am still sensitive, and want to rip the throat out of every hag I see wearing a fur coat; but I am instead putting my energy into helping the animals I care about.
And it doesn%26#039;t matter what you care about, but hold on to that thing which is important to you. If you don%26#039;t find something worthwhile in your life, it will only be a source of misery for you.|||Pangel answered wisely.
I am so sorry.|||This story is terrible and makes me feel so sad, i think the only real justice for people like this is the death sentence, life for a life.|||I makes me depressed|||You are empathic. Look this up on Google, you will find what you need if you study this. The story of Job elicits rage from the depths of my being, it is nothing but a ruse to make people feel guilty for feeling what they feel. Your feelings are valid, they are your reality. You just need to learn how to work with them so they don%26#039;t tear you apart. I wish for you that you find peace. Take care.|||You and anyone else you can get to help you should write a book of Emily%26#039;s story. Apparently there%26#039;s a lot to say about it, and I for one would like to hear it. Stories of child abuse can often cause a parent to calm themselves and realize how fragile a child is.
Also, truly sadistic, just plain evil parents like that need to be dealt with severely. Actually, keeping them locked up (separately, of course) for the rest of their lives may indeed be a harder punishment than executing them. It might also give them time to talk to reporters and social workers and become a part of the campaign to end this sort of horror. That%26#039;s a lot of the value of these sorts of stories: study them and learn how to prevent them.|||Thank you for keeping Emily%26#039;s memory alive and in telling us of the injustice given to her by some very sick and sadistic parents, you help raise awareness that there is a lot to still be done in terms of stopping child abuse from happening.
If your post helps another child, then you have accomplished something very important here. Thank you for this. It reminds me to love my children all the more so they grow up safe and confident. Thank you for this.
But when you ask about God, I once heard something very profound. Emily never knew what it was to be loved. She was born into a world of cruelty. In my faith, we believe that an innocent, one who is this young, is taken to heaven when they die. And if you look at it from this perspective, God actually took her away from the hurt, pain, and abuse; and in so doing, he protected her from further harm. These parents were punished. If she had not died or had not been tortured to this level, could this abuse have gone on for years and years?
You cannot help that Emily. But you can help other children like her. You have a purpose in life, and that is to protect children. But, I want you not to go through life angry at everyone else. In my faith, anger is a sin, when it eats at you to the point where it takes everything from you. Instead, Anger needs to be turned into something positive. Action. Not violence, but raising awareness, educating others. You have a gift to help people see inside of you - that%26#039;s a wonderful talent. You have the ability to write to stir people%26#039;s souls. Not an easy achievement. Instead of being bitter, use this anger as something productive to raise awareness. In so doing, you may help to prevent another situation like Emily%26#039;s.|||read about job he maintained a good attitude despite the trials and afflictions that he faced
A 5 year old girl I know was raped, disemboweled and hanged will still alive. This was done by her own horribly abusive parents. She died totally alone never knowing love or anything good. At her enormous school and classroom, only the attendance board knew her name. When she died it was in the local news for a few days. People pretended to grieve but a few days later it was though it never happened. People forgot all about it a few days later.
The people of that community are enjoying their happy attitudes right now. It%26#039;s just another beautiful day for them, there was never a little girl named Emily.
I%26#039;m the only one who still visits her grave and I am a complete stranger.
Why in ****%26#039;s name should I choose to be happy and satisfied when injustice lives so abundantly?|||because darling .... life does go on
while I think it is very honourable and lovely of you to keep this little girls memory alive....
there are wonderful things in life
and keeping a hold of that anger wont do anything but add to the anger of the world
use it !!
join a charity for abused children
get productive
make a difference
(((((HUGS))))))
edit
people dont only do good just to feel good about themself
people do good because they are passionate about things as you are .... but they turn this into something resourceful and helpful|||Get a purpose...
Find him, and destroy him.
Very slowly.|||Because it will eat you alive. The way you feel today will be who you are tomorrow. I%26#039;m sure Emily would rather have a positive person remember her rather than an angry malcontent. It%26#039;s good that you want to remember her, but don%26#039;t let it destroy you. If you do, her parents will have killed you too.|||Believe me, I know how you feel. But you cannot take the blame for the world. It will only lead to your own ruin.|||I%26#039;m sorry, that%26#039;s horrible.
Work to actively change things for other little girls-- there are lots of things that can be done to improve the world that are only possible if everyone makes an effort. I%26#039;m sure it could be a cathartic experience for you, as well as genuinely bettering someone else%26#039;s life.
---
EDIT:
I don%26#039;t think everyone but you who does good things, only does them for selfish reasons. I realize you%26#039;re angry, but stop being so self-righteous.
If you are working to actively change things, you%26#039;re doing the best you can do. I%26#039;ve also seen and worked with children who had their arms macheted off by government sponsered terrorist groups in the Sudan, after watching their parents raped, maimed and mounted on pikes.
I%26#039;ve peer-counselled a girl who worked in a sweatshop wearing a diaper half her life and then was sold by her father as a sex slave-- she lived in one room for 4 years and escaped on her own, and is now, like I did after I was raped, peer-counselling girls who have no one else to turn to.
It%26#039;s easy for people to have escapist attitudes and praise the lord for every goddamn thing when they have no idea, and don%26#039;t care to know, what%26#039;s going on in the rest of the world.
The rest of us are angry, hurting, frustrated and just trying to make it through the day like you are. I%26#039;m sorry you%26#039;re so resentful that I%26#039;ve maintained my ability to be happy at times and laugh while never giving up on the causes that are so dear to me. But, I%26#039;ve worked hard to be able to get through the day, and even enjoy it. I%26#039;m proud to be where I am now, because were I incapacitated by my pain, I would not only be hurt, but I would be USELESS.
---
Edit 2:
God is %26quot;better%26quot; than this world? He%26#039;s an omnipotent creator and he was somehow powerless to intervene on Emily%26#039;s behalf? You think so highly of a being you know is imaginary, yet think yourself to be the only decent person in this world. Yeah, that makes sense.
Somehow you%26#039;ve managed to surround yourself with reality, but ignore it. I have no sympathy for your bullshit attitude, stop trying to escape.|||There is no cosmic justice putting right all the wrongs. Humanity invented god to pretend there was, but you%26#039;ll notice all the wrongs get righted in the (non-existent) afterlife.
No, there%26#039;s just us
But I don%26#039;t see that as reason to be miserable. For every evil SOB like ones you mention there are some good, good people. The world isn%26#039;t all bleak and people are - in my experience - mostly worth spending time with.
You have one life and you can spend it contemplating the terrible injustices, or you can do something about it. Your call.|||bad stuff happens all the time. Horrible things that make you question all the things you believe. Sometimes they happen very close to home and sometimes you only hear about it on the news. Life isn%26#039;t fair and there is no such thing as real justice. But it%26#039;s no reason not to live YOUR life the best you can.|||Your anger will destroy you...that is why you must look on the bright side...my life has personally been a bit of a horror but I refuse to dwell on it...YOU are dwelling on the horror...and it is making you ill...it is not your responsibility to suffer for the sins of the world...unless of course you secretly enjoy doing just that...so..just as I thought..you do enjoy it...so have fun...|||Because nothing is forever and her pain is over. All thats left is to punish those who did it to her. Everyone needs to move on, honey.|||The world is an evil place.
You have no need to change your outlook. It is what it is--simply the effect of the things you have observed around you.
A person can only be so happy when pain and suffering is constantly among them...and I know how that feels.
You just have to hope that some day you can come to terms with the awful things that happen in this world. You%26#039;re not a superhero, and you can%26#039;t protect everyone.
However, the fact that you go to her grave and she was a complete stranger to you shows that you have an immense amount of compassion. In fact, I have great respect for you for that.
Life is a difficult concept to grasp at times. All we have is our world around us...and you just have to make the best of it.
I hope you find peace in your life very soon. I%26#039;ll be thinking of you. :)|||you have a beautiful heart|||~Beautifully and well said Pangel~|||Be sure they will be punished in the dayafter.
[3.196] Let it not deceive you that those who disbelieve go to and fro in the cities fearlessly.
[3.197] A brief enjoyment! then their abode is hell, and evil is the resting-place.|||You poor person! There is only one God. You should change your attitude! Be happy! God saved us from death. Here is a way to look at it. God puts us on the earth for only a short time..... so we should make the most of it! When our friends and family die it is always sad for us...... we just have to remember that she is with God and we will see her again if we follow God%26#039;s orders and remember: you should not be mad at God for what happened to Emily. I%26#039;ll pray for you. You know not what you are doing.|||Because your attitude will eventually destroy you. What you describe is terrible but our duty to the dead is to keep living and do all we can to make our part of the world better. This can only be done with love. Sorry for your pain but you must go on. Peace and God bless you.|||That%26#039;s horrible! I remember being that age. I can%26#039;t even begin to imagine being raised that way. Sweetie, you can%26#039;t give people a conscience. Most of them have one, and they haven%26#039;t forgotten her. This disturbs people so badly, they don%26#039;t want to think about it. It terrifies you for your own children. Everyone is so full of fear. We need to know our neighbors better. Maybe such as this can be avoided if we just knew our neighbors. I know it%26#039;s inconvenient and we don%26#039;t have much time for ourselves any more. That%26#039;s how these things happen. Some we can avoid and some we can%26#039;t. Getting angry at the others won%26#039;t help. Maybe you can direct your energies into starting some kind of program to make sure children don%26#039;t fall through the wide slots in the floor boards. Do something positive with your anger. Don%26#039;t judge the others so harshly. You don%26#039;t know where they are and how they are. Just like the little neighbor girl who was so hideously murdered.|||There are many who do good not to feel better about themselves but because it is the right thing. Because there are people like Emily whose very lives depend upon them doing good. AND THEIR JUSTICE DEPENDS UPON YOU AND ME.
I am going to dare to suggest that you change your attitude, not necessarily to see the good in life (at least not all the time). I am going to suggest that since you were touched so much by Emily and her trials, pain, and cruel untimely death that you ask yourself what would Emily want me to do? There are thousands and thousands of Emily%26#039;s in the world. While it may be to late for this precious one YOU can work to the best of your ability to make sure that not all end up with her fate (think if someone had been used their outrage over another child in this manner, Emily might not have met the end she did). Let her name be remembered through your actions, that her life and death changed something. Simply put the path your on helps no one, least of all Emily and those like her out there. Peter Maurin ( a monk and co founder of the Catholic worker) said We are God%26#039;s hands in the world and if YOU must be the change you wish to see in the world. Emily because she touched you is a part of you now. Will you let her die and be forgotten again inside of you?
EDIT: %26quot;then my wrath is the only part of me that there should be.%26quot;- - - -that was probably the mantra of Emily%26#039;s parents if you think about it. If you don%26#039;t do something different you run the risk of becoming something akin to them, not the same but something like that. What a slap in the face that would be to Emily.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QDm03Foq2鈥?/a>|||Actually, GOD does care. We, however, lose faith.
Mark 4:38 聽And he was in the hinder part of the ship, asleep on a pillow: and they awake him, and say unto him, Master, carest thou not that we perish?
It would help to read the whole story, otherwise, this verse alone will fill you with more hate.
I will pray for you because you are the only person who cared for her.
GOD bless|||The story is sad, however it happens every day in many countires throught out this world. Injustice happens not because of God%26#039;s failure, it happens because of humans who lack the courage to stand up and speak out.|||God was right there suffering with her when that was happening to her. She is peacefully asleep right now, free of pain, and when Christ returns, he will lovingly resurrect her into a new, physical, eternal body, in which death or pain will have no power. He will wipe all the tears from her eyes, and the things she suffered on this Earth will become a faded, distant memory. The joys of Heaven will be so great, she will not be able to remember what happened before. It will seem trivial by comparison.
My God is a God of justice and mercy. Tnose who did this barbaric act, unless they repent of their sins, will be punished and destroyed permanently.
Jesus told us, that, because of the stain of sin in this world, %26quot;We will have trouble%26quot;. That is why children suffer and injustice is rampant. It%26#039;s because of the sin condition in this world. But God has a plan. Two thousand years ago, He paid the ultimate sacrifice on our behalf so that we can get to Heaven. Satan hates this, because he knows his time is short, so he is doing his very best to corrupt humanity, and take as many humans with him as possible. He corrupted the girl%26#039;s parents and guided them in their actions. They had Free Will and chose to follow Satan instead of Christ. But very soon, Christ will return and destroy Satan and all traces of sin. I am looking forward to that day, because there will no longer be suffering, and all the junk that%26#039;s going on in the world today will come to an end. Until that time, we can expect to see more and more sin and conflict - God described it as labor pains just before a baby comes. The pain gets worse and worse, and then, when it%26#039;s at it%26#039;s worst, a beautiful baby comes, and the mother is overjoyed, and forgets about all the pain. That%26#039;s what it will be like when Christ returns.|||I am so incredibly sorry. I know what it%26#039;s like to be that disgusted and that angry over something like this. I%26#039;ve been there. The little girl who was raped and buried alive by her neighbor a few years ago in Florida was a friend of my family. I was wrecked afterward, and I was told often to change my attitude and try to see the positive. Every time I see her daddy, Mark, on television trying to get laws passed in her name, or that beast of a man, John Couey, who did it, I get physically ill remembering what that time was like. I have no advice to offer you about this. I can tell you that if you ever would just like to rant and vent, feel free to email or IM me anytime. I%26#039;m a good listener, and nothing you say will shock me. As I said, I%26#039;ve been there.|||I would never ask you to be happy or satisfied, but you my friend suffer from sensitivity. It is an affliction, the opposite of psychopathy. You feel rage toward the world because you are powerless over your inability to prevent the innocent from suffering.
May I suggest you take up a cause which you feel is worthwhile? Fight for child protection, or animal rights, or adult literacy; whatever. Something that lets you feel like even though the world is fkd, you are helping someone somewhere and making the tiniest difference.
That is what has worked for me. I am still sensitive, and want to rip the throat out of every hag I see wearing a fur coat; but I am instead putting my energy into helping the animals I care about.
And it doesn%26#039;t matter what you care about, but hold on to that thing which is important to you. If you don%26#039;t find something worthwhile in your life, it will only be a source of misery for you.|||Pangel answered wisely.
I am so sorry.|||This story is terrible and makes me feel so sad, i think the only real justice for people like this is the death sentence, life for a life.|||I makes me depressed|||You are empathic. Look this up on Google, you will find what you need if you study this. The story of Job elicits rage from the depths of my being, it is nothing but a ruse to make people feel guilty for feeling what they feel. Your feelings are valid, they are your reality. You just need to learn how to work with them so they don%26#039;t tear you apart. I wish for you that you find peace. Take care.|||You and anyone else you can get to help you should write a book of Emily%26#039;s story. Apparently there%26#039;s a lot to say about it, and I for one would like to hear it. Stories of child abuse can often cause a parent to calm themselves and realize how fragile a child is.
Also, truly sadistic, just plain evil parents like that need to be dealt with severely. Actually, keeping them locked up (separately, of course) for the rest of their lives may indeed be a harder punishment than executing them. It might also give them time to talk to reporters and social workers and become a part of the campaign to end this sort of horror. That%26#039;s a lot of the value of these sorts of stories: study them and learn how to prevent them.|||Thank you for keeping Emily%26#039;s memory alive and in telling us of the injustice given to her by some very sick and sadistic parents, you help raise awareness that there is a lot to still be done in terms of stopping child abuse from happening.
If your post helps another child, then you have accomplished something very important here. Thank you for this. It reminds me to love my children all the more so they grow up safe and confident. Thank you for this.
But when you ask about God, I once heard something very profound. Emily never knew what it was to be loved. She was born into a world of cruelty. In my faith, we believe that an innocent, one who is this young, is taken to heaven when they die. And if you look at it from this perspective, God actually took her away from the hurt, pain, and abuse; and in so doing, he protected her from further harm. These parents were punished. If she had not died or had not been tortured to this level, could this abuse have gone on for years and years?
You cannot help that Emily. But you can help other children like her. You have a purpose in life, and that is to protect children. But, I want you not to go through life angry at everyone else. In my faith, anger is a sin, when it eats at you to the point where it takes everything from you. Instead, Anger needs to be turned into something positive. Action. Not violence, but raising awareness, educating others. You have a gift to help people see inside of you - that%26#039;s a wonderful talent. You have the ability to write to stir people%26#039;s souls. Not an easy achievement. Instead of being bitter, use this anger as something productive to raise awareness. In so doing, you may help to prevent another situation like Emily%26#039;s.|||read about job he maintained a good attitude despite the trials and afflictions that he faced
When you get to Heaven & find Judas there, how would it change your beliefs now?
The Judas I%26#039;m talking about it the one who betrayed Jesus. If you found Judas in heaven when you got there, right now how would this influence your decision that Judas went to hell for what he did? Would this change your attitude on what we were lead to believe about Judas %26amp; the betrayer?|||I don%26#039;t think it would change how I believe at all. If Judas was truly sorry for what he did and repented, he should go to heaven. In the Bible it says that only the sin against the Holy Spirit, the sin of disbelief, will keep you from heaven. I also don%26#039;t believe that suicide is a sin (because Judas supposedly hung himself in remorse.) I%26#039;m not saying I%26#039;m Judas%26#039; #1 fan or anything but if God can forgive, why not?|||Alright, if I get to heaven alone, I dont think I need to change my beliefs. The grace of God is given to all because we are all sinners period.|||i dunno...im not even sure if Judas went to Hell or not...|||what?|||Why waste your time on a what if question like this|||If Juda is in heaven I would wonder why Jesus said he was a devil. I suppose He could explain this to everyone%26#039;s satisfaction.
agapefromnc|||Not a bit. As my God is a Forgiving God. By the way. Why do people assume Judas was such a bad person? He was one of Christ%26#039;s hand picked Disciples. He just did what it was his destiny to do. And he felt so bad about it he hung himself.|||It wouldn%26#039;t.
I believe that Judas was mis-lead by the Jewish leaders. I believe that he sincerely thought he was doing the right thing.
If I were to see him in heaven it would only verify the unconditional love of God.|||No worries--he won%26#039;t be there. He is part of the dust just as everyone else is who has died--except for Christ.
As for Hell(Hades), THAT is just the common grave of mankind.|||Wouldn%26#039;t change my beliefs. Jesus said %26quot;One of you will betray me this night%26quot;. It was in his plan. Judas had to do it otherwise Jesus could not have died on the cross and saved us from our sins.|||There will be many people who think they will be in heaven and will not make it, also there is people we may think will be in hell but will be with Jesus. Unless you accept Jesus Christ as your personal Savior you will never make it. The thief on the cross did not have much time left and he was able to make it and so can anyone who accepts salvation that is given to us by God|||You fail to see how crucial Judas%26#039;s part was in Jesus mission! Make no judgment on the one who had to betray Jesus, for even Jesus knew what part Judas had to play! Could you have done your part if you knew it involved betrayal? Knowing that without you Jesus mission could not be fulfilled?|||first of all, i would be thankful that i got to Heaven. secondly, i would be relieved that there is forgiveness.|||It wouldn%26#039;t, I believe betraying Christ was the grievous act he had to commit.|||I have enough faith in the Bible to know, Judas is not in heaven.
Sorry about that, but that%26#039;s just how it is.
No if%26#039;s or what if%26#039;s.
Just doesn%26#039;t apply here.
agapefromnc|||Not a bit. As my God is a Forgiving God. By the way. Why do people assume Judas was such a bad person? He was one of Christ%26#039;s hand picked Disciples. He just did what it was his destiny to do. And he felt so bad about it he hung himself.|||It wouldn%26#039;t.
I believe that Judas was mis-lead by the Jewish leaders. I believe that he sincerely thought he was doing the right thing.
If I were to see him in heaven it would only verify the unconditional love of God.|||No worries--he won%26#039;t be there. He is part of the dust just as everyone else is who has died--except for Christ.
As for Hell(Hades), THAT is just the common grave of mankind.|||Wouldn%26#039;t change my beliefs. Jesus said %26quot;One of you will betray me this night%26quot;. It was in his plan. Judas had to do it otherwise Jesus could not have died on the cross and saved us from our sins.|||There will be many people who think they will be in heaven and will not make it, also there is people we may think will be in hell but will be with Jesus. Unless you accept Jesus Christ as your personal Savior you will never make it. The thief on the cross did not have much time left and he was able to make it and so can anyone who accepts salvation that is given to us by God|||You fail to see how crucial Judas%26#039;s part was in Jesus mission! Make no judgment on the one who had to betray Jesus, for even Jesus knew what part Judas had to play! Could you have done your part if you knew it involved betrayal? Knowing that without you Jesus mission could not be fulfilled?|||first of all, i would be thankful that i got to Heaven. secondly, i would be relieved that there is forgiveness.|||It wouldn%26#039;t, I believe betraying Christ was the grievous act he had to commit.|||I have enough faith in the Bible to know, Judas is not in heaven.
Sorry about that, but that%26#039;s just how it is.
No if%26#039;s or what if%26#039;s.
Just doesn%26#039;t apply here.
How has this passage '1 corinthians 14:34-35 ' changed your attitude towards christianity ?
1 corinthians 14:34-35 %26quot;Let your women keep silence in the churches: for it is not permitted unto them to speak; but they are commanded to be under obedience as also saith the law.
35 And if they will learn any thing, let them ask their husbands at home: for it is a shame for women to speak in the church.%26quot;|||I think the bible has provided great teachings, and this example teachings that aren%26#039;t so clear.
There must be a clear background and purpose for Paul to have mentioned this. Perhaps cultural traditions or ignorance to laws provided the setting for these verses.
______________________________________…
In both of these verses, Joseph Smith changed the word speak to rule in the Inspired Version. Elder Bruce R. McConkie wrote:
“May women speak in Church? Yes, in the sense of teaching, counseling, testifying, exhorting, and the like; no, in the sense of assuming rule over the Church as such, and in attempting to give direction as to how God’s affairs on earth shall be regulated: ‘A woman has no right to found or organize a church—God never sent them to do it.’ (Teachings, p. 212.) Paul is here telling the sisters they are subject to the priesthood, that it is not their province to rule and reign, that the bishop’s wife is not the bishop.” (DNTC, 2:387–88.)
|||It is a biblical precept and definition of the authoritative differences between man and woman. Also, this is not something exclusive to Christianity, but argued using Hebrew scripture: %26quot;Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire [shall be] to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.%26quot; (Gen 3:16) In addition, verse 35 has the verb %26quot;learn%26quot; in the Infinitive suggesting a warning against an active and vocal inquiry on their part during the service.|||No.
No one is confused by Paul%26#039;s instruction that members of the church %26quot;greet all the brethren with an holy kiss%26quot; (1 Thes. 5:26). If we were to attempt to follow such instruction today, no one would dare go to church, regardless of which gender was doing the preaching. As to Paul%26#039;s statement about women keeping silent, it must have had reference to presiding because he expressly says that they were to both pray and prophesy (see 1 Cor. 11:5).
Paul was concerned because of the local customs at the time were screeming and carrying on.|||Some people take things out of context in order to support some personal opinion or in an attempt to misrepresent and slander the Bible.
Compare Pentecost, where all present (including Jesus%26#039; mother Mary and other women) spoke in tongues to all the Jews gathered there. Acts 1:13-2:21.
Also compare the fact that Paul entrusted the letter to the Romans to a woman, named Phoebe, whom he calls %26quot;a diakonos (minister, or deacon) in the congregation of Cenchrea.%26quot; Romans 16:1-2.
The verses in 1 Corinthians 14:33-35, about women keeping silent in the congregation, makes perfect sense IN CONTEXT.
The context goes from the start of chapter 12 through the end of chapter 14. That context involves the discussion about gifts of the spirit (speaking in tongues, translating tongues, prophesying, etc.)
The situation, as described, is that unbelievers are present and Christians are speaking in tongues, etc. The purpose of the entire discussion to keep everything organized under such circumstances; which is clearly stated at the end of the context in chapter 14 verse 40.
It is IN THIS CONTEXT that the women were to keep silent. Which makes sense, since women in Corinth had a very low status. A woman speaking in public would likely be an unacceptable shock to an unbelieving Corinthian male. So they would keep quiet, in order to keep things organized. This rule likely extended to other regions as well, where women had low status.|||3 other people have asked this today, look for those answers...
basically you have to read those verses in context of the time period and the situation. They asked women to ask their husbands questions rather than stopping the meetings. Women were not educated at that time as they are now, so that verse is not applicable as thist time. |||It helped illustrate that Paul is an inordinately important factor in the rise of Christianity as a religion, and that Paul appears to have been a nasty piece of work.|||Read in context. FOUR individuals or groups are told to shut up in the assembly. Look for the REASONS, then you might understand.|||Just one of many instructions of Christ which too many, of those who %26quot;claim%26quot; to be %26quot;christians%26quot;, do not follow.
btw...Lucytoo5( above answer) is incorrect|||It hasn%26#039;t affected my view. I believe in it now, and I will always. Nothing you can do to change that.|||speak means to gossip not to not literally talk.|||somebody needs a hug ((( ))) my attitude is unwavering.|||If Jesus was really supernatural then the times wouldn%26#039;t matter. He would have taught them to change.|||It%26#039;s find with me it has changed nonthing about my mind.|||It sounds like men wrote the bible, not God.
35 And if they will learn any thing, let them ask their husbands at home: for it is a shame for women to speak in the church.%26quot;|||I think the bible has provided great teachings, and this example teachings that aren%26#039;t so clear.
There must be a clear background and purpose for Paul to have mentioned this. Perhaps cultural traditions or ignorance to laws provided the setting for these verses.
______________________________________…
In both of these verses, Joseph Smith changed the word speak to rule in the Inspired Version. Elder Bruce R. McConkie wrote:
“May women speak in Church? Yes, in the sense of teaching, counseling, testifying, exhorting, and the like; no, in the sense of assuming rule over the Church as such, and in attempting to give direction as to how God’s affairs on earth shall be regulated: ‘A woman has no right to found or organize a church—God never sent them to do it.’ (Teachings, p. 212.) Paul is here telling the sisters they are subject to the priesthood, that it is not their province to rule and reign, that the bishop’s wife is not the bishop.” (DNTC, 2:387–88.)
|||It is a biblical precept and definition of the authoritative differences between man and woman. Also, this is not something exclusive to Christianity, but argued using Hebrew scripture: %26quot;Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire [shall be] to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.%26quot; (Gen 3:16) In addition, verse 35 has the verb %26quot;learn%26quot; in the Infinitive suggesting a warning against an active and vocal inquiry on their part during the service.|||No.
No one is confused by Paul%26#039;s instruction that members of the church %26quot;greet all the brethren with an holy kiss%26quot; (1 Thes. 5:26). If we were to attempt to follow such instruction today, no one would dare go to church, regardless of which gender was doing the preaching. As to Paul%26#039;s statement about women keeping silent, it must have had reference to presiding because he expressly says that they were to both pray and prophesy (see 1 Cor. 11:5).
Paul was concerned because of the local customs at the time were screeming and carrying on.|||Some people take things out of context in order to support some personal opinion or in an attempt to misrepresent and slander the Bible.
Compare Pentecost, where all present (including Jesus%26#039; mother Mary and other women) spoke in tongues to all the Jews gathered there. Acts 1:13-2:21.
Also compare the fact that Paul entrusted the letter to the Romans to a woman, named Phoebe, whom he calls %26quot;a diakonos (minister, or deacon) in the congregation of Cenchrea.%26quot; Romans 16:1-2.
The verses in 1 Corinthians 14:33-35, about women keeping silent in the congregation, makes perfect sense IN CONTEXT.
The context goes from the start of chapter 12 through the end of chapter 14. That context involves the discussion about gifts of the spirit (speaking in tongues, translating tongues, prophesying, etc.)
The situation, as described, is that unbelievers are present and Christians are speaking in tongues, etc. The purpose of the entire discussion to keep everything organized under such circumstances; which is clearly stated at the end of the context in chapter 14 verse 40.
It is IN THIS CONTEXT that the women were to keep silent. Which makes sense, since women in Corinth had a very low status. A woman speaking in public would likely be an unacceptable shock to an unbelieving Corinthian male. So they would keep quiet, in order to keep things organized. This rule likely extended to other regions as well, where women had low status.|||3 other people have asked this today, look for those answers...
basically you have to read those verses in context of the time period and the situation. They asked women to ask their husbands questions rather than stopping the meetings. Women were not educated at that time as they are now, so that verse is not applicable as thist time. |||It helped illustrate that Paul is an inordinately important factor in the rise of Christianity as a religion, and that Paul appears to have been a nasty piece of work.|||Read in context. FOUR individuals or groups are told to shut up in the assembly. Look for the REASONS, then you might understand.|||Just one of many instructions of Christ which too many, of those who %26quot;claim%26quot; to be %26quot;christians%26quot;, do not follow.
btw...Lucytoo5( above answer) is incorrect|||It hasn%26#039;t affected my view. I believe in it now, and I will always. Nothing you can do to change that.|||speak means to gossip not to not literally talk.|||somebody needs a hug ((( ))) my attitude is unwavering.|||If Jesus was really supernatural then the times wouldn%26#039;t matter. He would have taught them to change.|||It%26#039;s find with me it has changed nonthing about my mind.|||It sounds like men wrote the bible, not God.
When you in three months in a relationship does your whole attitude change? do you ever think its not meant?
When you with your love for three months and see changes involving communcation, attention or love do you believe that in your heart that it wasnt for you? basically tell me in your words how everything go wrong during your three months and if you have done that to the person you say you love why did your attitude change?|||Let me remember to %26quot;back in the day%26quot;.
There%26#039;s also the whole idea that if I think he%26#039;s cheating, I don%26#039;t have too much time invested in this guy, I%26#039;ll just break it off and go with a guy that makes me feel more secure.
There%26#039;s also the whole idea that if I think he%26#039;s cheating, I don%26#039;t have too much time invested in this guy, I%26#039;ll just break it off and go with a guy that makes me feel more secure.
What do these quotes mean? How can they relate to your everyday life?
Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment.
Buddha
If you don%26#039;t like something, change it. If you can%26#039;t change it, change your attitude.
Maya Angelou
In order to succeed, your desire for success should be greater than your fear of failure.
Bill Cosby|||Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment.
Buddha...
What this means is that time spent thinking about the past...of how things %26quot;used to be%26quot; is wasted. Time spend daydreaming about how you wish things would be in the future is wasted. One should concentrate on today. Work on making today what it should be...because tomorrow isn%26#039;t here yet and yesterday is gone forever.
If you don%26#039;t like something, change it. If you can%26#039;t change it, change your attitude.
Maya Angelou...
This is basically like the Serenity Prayer. %26quot;God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.%26quot; She%26#039;s saying that if there are things in your life or your world that you do not like...do whatever is in your power to do to change it. If it is something that you have no control or influence over...then you have to change the way you think about it. You have to change your mindset...so you accept that thing...so you avoid obsessing on things that are beyond your control. So you don%26#039;t waste your time and energy needlessly.
In order to succeed, your desire for success should be greater than your fear of failure.
Bill Cosby...
He%26#039;s saying that in order to achieve your goals, you must overcome your fear of failure. If you allow your fears to hold you back. If you allow them to make you be conservative in the way you approach life...then you will surely fail. Your drive...your ambition...your devotion to your goals, must be greater than your insecurities and fears.
How these things relate to everyday life is that they are absolute truths. These are not just opinions or witty sayings. They are fact. Dwelling on the past, daydreaming about the future, worrying over things that we cannot change or allowing your fears and insecurities to dictate your actions are all things that will get in the way of you ever having the life you want to have. You must be the best %26quot;you%26quot; that you can be every day. You must concentrate on today, and face each day with hope and desire. Then, you will live life to its fullest and find the success and peace of mind you are looking for.
Buddha
If you don%26#039;t like something, change it. If you can%26#039;t change it, change your attitude.
Maya Angelou
In order to succeed, your desire for success should be greater than your fear of failure.
Bill Cosby|||Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment.
Buddha...
What this means is that time spent thinking about the past...of how things %26quot;used to be%26quot; is wasted. Time spend daydreaming about how you wish things would be in the future is wasted. One should concentrate on today. Work on making today what it should be...because tomorrow isn%26#039;t here yet and yesterday is gone forever.
If you don%26#039;t like something, change it. If you can%26#039;t change it, change your attitude.
Maya Angelou...
This is basically like the Serenity Prayer. %26quot;God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.%26quot; She%26#039;s saying that if there are things in your life or your world that you do not like...do whatever is in your power to do to change it. If it is something that you have no control or influence over...then you have to change the way you think about it. You have to change your mindset...so you accept that thing...so you avoid obsessing on things that are beyond your control. So you don%26#039;t waste your time and energy needlessly.
In order to succeed, your desire for success should be greater than your fear of failure.
Bill Cosby...
He%26#039;s saying that in order to achieve your goals, you must overcome your fear of failure. If you allow your fears to hold you back. If you allow them to make you be conservative in the way you approach life...then you will surely fail. Your drive...your ambition...your devotion to your goals, must be greater than your insecurities and fears.
How these things relate to everyday life is that they are absolute truths. These are not just opinions or witty sayings. They are fact. Dwelling on the past, daydreaming about the future, worrying over things that we cannot change or allowing your fears and insecurities to dictate your actions are all things that will get in the way of you ever having the life you want to have. You must be the best %26quot;you%26quot; that you can be every day. You must concentrate on today, and face each day with hope and desire. Then, you will live life to its fullest and find the success and peace of mind you are looking for.
How will your attitude change when the smoking ban comes in?
Please follow this online questionnaire form to see! Thanks.
http://www.zoomerang.com/survey.zgi?p=WEB226EAJHDDQ2|||I look forward to seeing them all standing outside in the pouring rain - I enjoy a good laugh ! ! !|||I%26#039;m not a smoker and I am so glad that they will mandate this smoking ban state wide. Horray!|||It didn%26#039;t affect me at all. I don%26#039;t smoke.
It%26#039;s been in affect for years now in Ontario Canada...|||same way it is now...............I don%26#039;t smoke anything but weed so same attitude..........so it won%26#039;t change...........don%26#039;t need your questionary to answer this!!|||i don%26#039;t smoke, but i%26#039;m glad it%26#039;s being banned in public places. all the passive smoking and the smell. its not fair. especially on children.|||Here in Ireland, It has been banned for a few years now,
and everyone here [Including smokers] thinks it%26#039;s great!
You can go to a pub or restaurant and breath CLEAN air!
Also, It was a boost for a lot of smokers to try and quit.
So, I%26#039;d say everyone will react the same to it in the UK.|||Won%26#039;t change my attitude I already lost my voice to cancer caused from smoking|||Just did the survey for ya!|||i shall actually enjoy going in to a pub, as that is one of the things that putts me off. nothing disgusts me more than to come home from a night out and stink of other ppls smoke.
from this answer you should b able to tell i am a non smoker and shall be over the moon about it.|||Its been in force here in wales for a month now and ive cut down a lot when i go out, but at the end of the day we live in a %26quot;free%26quot; country, it should never be down to politicians to tell people what they can and cant do!|||I will be glad when the new laws come into effect.
I cant stand smoke, and it is unfair to have to even as much as smell it.
I was in a pub at the weekend, and there was some bloke rabbiting on about how he is being persecuted by the new laws.
I went up to him and the conversation went like this:
Me - You smoke i take it?
Him - yeah
Me - Smoke makes my eyes hurt, damages my lungs and makes my hair and clothes smell.
Him - so what
Me - I like to drink beer
Him - so
Me - The residue of my pleasure is urine, so if thats your attitude, how about i stand on the bar and pee all over you.
Him - Growl
Me - Youre a minority now!|||I have just completed the survey to which your link refers. It was good to have my say, even though it means nothing.|||just answered survey|||(1) Frustrated (2) Nothing to do (3) Can%26#039;t eat (4) Becomes fat (5) Easily get stressed|||i am a smoker, but i really need to give up, i think its a great idea to ban it in pubs, those poor staff who have never smoked! What an idiot, i gave up for two years, but piled on so much weight, used that excuse to start again, now its even harder. People will just get used to no smoking in public, look out though, if too many give up, wheres all the lost tax revenue coming from?Have to put more on alchohol, ha then there will be no more pubs!|||I am a smoker but do need to give up so I suppose it is a good thing but I don%26#039;t drink so am not that bothered about pubs. so many restaurants are smoke free now so I don%26#039;t think it will bother me.
I understand the health implications and agree with that (thought not with the idiots who were standing in the middle of Piccadilly Circus moaning about fumes from other people%26#039;s smoking!!) I get fed up when people moan about the smell. I hate the smell of stale bear, cheap perfume, men in suits that have been worn all week (especially in summer) - that should definately be against the law!!
http://www.zoomerang.com/survey.zgi?p=WEB226EAJHDDQ2|||I look forward to seeing them all standing outside in the pouring rain - I enjoy a good laugh ! ! !|||I%26#039;m not a smoker and I am so glad that they will mandate this smoking ban state wide. Horray!|||It didn%26#039;t affect me at all. I don%26#039;t smoke.
It%26#039;s been in affect for years now in Ontario Canada...|||same way it is now...............I don%26#039;t smoke anything but weed so same attitude..........so it won%26#039;t change...........don%26#039;t need your questionary to answer this!!|||i don%26#039;t smoke, but i%26#039;m glad it%26#039;s being banned in public places. all the passive smoking and the smell. its not fair. especially on children.|||Here in Ireland, It has been banned for a few years now,
and everyone here [Including smokers] thinks it%26#039;s great!
You can go to a pub or restaurant and breath CLEAN air!
Also, It was a boost for a lot of smokers to try and quit.
So, I%26#039;d say everyone will react the same to it in the UK.|||Won%26#039;t change my attitude I already lost my voice to cancer caused from smoking|||Just did the survey for ya!|||i shall actually enjoy going in to a pub, as that is one of the things that putts me off. nothing disgusts me more than to come home from a night out and stink of other ppls smoke.
from this answer you should b able to tell i am a non smoker and shall be over the moon about it.|||Its been in force here in wales for a month now and ive cut down a lot when i go out, but at the end of the day we live in a %26quot;free%26quot; country, it should never be down to politicians to tell people what they can and cant do!|||I will be glad when the new laws come into effect.
I cant stand smoke, and it is unfair to have to even as much as smell it.
I was in a pub at the weekend, and there was some bloke rabbiting on about how he is being persecuted by the new laws.
I went up to him and the conversation went like this:
Me - You smoke i take it?
Him - yeah
Me - Smoke makes my eyes hurt, damages my lungs and makes my hair and clothes smell.
Him - so what
Me - I like to drink beer
Him - so
Me - The residue of my pleasure is urine, so if thats your attitude, how about i stand on the bar and pee all over you.
Him - Growl
Me - Youre a minority now!|||I have just completed the survey to which your link refers. It was good to have my say, even though it means nothing.|||just answered survey|||(1) Frustrated (2) Nothing to do (3) Can%26#039;t eat (4) Becomes fat (5) Easily get stressed|||i am a smoker, but i really need to give up, i think its a great idea to ban it in pubs, those poor staff who have never smoked! What an idiot, i gave up for two years, but piled on so much weight, used that excuse to start again, now its even harder. People will just get used to no smoking in public, look out though, if too many give up, wheres all the lost tax revenue coming from?Have to put more on alchohol, ha then there will be no more pubs!|||I am a smoker but do need to give up so I suppose it is a good thing but I don%26#039;t drink so am not that bothered about pubs. so many restaurants are smoke free now so I don%26#039;t think it will bother me.
I understand the health implications and agree with that (thought not with the idiots who were standing in the middle of Piccadilly Circus moaning about fumes from other people%26#039;s smoking!!) I get fed up when people moan about the smell. I hate the smell of stale bear, cheap perfume, men in suits that have been worn all week (especially in summer) - that should definately be against the law!!
Does anyone know about any books on changing your attitude?
They say you can improve your life by improving your attitude.
My friends, family and coworkers are always telling me to change my attitude. And if changing my attitude will make my life bearable then I%26#039;m all for it.
But how do you go about doing it? Does anyone know of any books about changing your attitude? Any advice?|||chicken soup for the ___ soul!!! they tend to inspire new ideas in people... but i have always believed that if you want to change your attitude change your decisions... instead of saying no to things say yes! help out someone even if you really don%26#039;t want to, go to some1%26#039;s party even if you don%26#039;t know them that well, get up the guts to ask someone out... just try/experience new things and make mistakes your attitude will change and you will become more confident and brave!|||hmm, throughout this year, i have read many books by nicholas sparks, and i have changed somewhat to a different person... a bit more hardworking, tend to respect people more, and etc
anyway, what makes you think book can change your attitude?
My friends, family and coworkers are always telling me to change my attitude. And if changing my attitude will make my life bearable then I%26#039;m all for it.
But how do you go about doing it? Does anyone know of any books about changing your attitude? Any advice?|||chicken soup for the ___ soul!!! they tend to inspire new ideas in people... but i have always believed that if you want to change your attitude change your decisions... instead of saying no to things say yes! help out someone even if you really don%26#039;t want to, go to some1%26#039;s party even if you don%26#039;t know them that well, get up the guts to ask someone out... just try/experience new things and make mistakes your attitude will change and you will become more confident and brave!|||hmm, throughout this year, i have read many books by nicholas sparks, and i have changed somewhat to a different person... a bit more hardworking, tend to respect people more, and etc
anyway, what makes you think book can change your attitude?
How do you ladies get your men to stop mis-behaving/acting right. Do you deprive, threaten?
What things do you say or what things do you take away? How do you change your attitude, how do you change your words?
This is after %26quot;talking%26quot; doesn%26#039;t help.|||i leave them, most guys don%26#039;t change.|||If talking doesn%26#039;t help, break up with them because it wasn%26#039;t meant to be. Nobody should have to change who they are in a relationship.|||Neither. I walk away.
There are far too many men out there to settle for a slug.|||My girl spanks me! Works every time.
This is after %26quot;talking%26quot; doesn%26#039;t help.|||i leave them, most guys don%26#039;t change.|||If talking doesn%26#039;t help, break up with them because it wasn%26#039;t meant to be. Nobody should have to change who they are in a relationship.|||Neither. I walk away.
There are far too many men out there to settle for a slug.|||My girl spanks me! Works every time.
How do you change yourself and your attitude?
i dont like the way ive been acting or treating people, especially my boyfriend. I just want to change. any ideas? seriously!|||Just let the people around you help you and don%26#039;t try and take everything on alone. Maybe talk to your boyfriend about the things that%26#039;s making you act differently.|||start listening to Dr. Laura|||Tell me when you are done.|||A personal journey into knowing self is the answer to your question. To know one self on the deepest level is to learn to %26#039;let go of%26#039; certain aspects of self that do NOT serve our higher purpose OR the people we love. To do otherwise keeps the cycle energised and resentment and bitterness manifest emotionally and become part of our reactiveness. This is not a guilt trip or a %26#039;beat myself up%26#039; place to be in, where one needs to be once %26#039;aware%26#039; of this aspect...is to do the %26#039;work%26#039;.
If one does not go within one will go without...and seriously we do not want this for ourselves or anyone we love....
First choice is to breathe....
Next choice after that may well to do to serve our highest potential to be the best we can be at any given moment. The power is now, right now, make the choice right now, to change.
Ask for cosmic help and you will receive, start opening your eyes for the help can come in a %26#039;book%26#039; or a simple %26#039;word%26#039; that is a keyword in your mind, that triggers the undeniable knowledge you have contained within you. Release it into your conscious life and live it, be it and just be happy. You are part of a grander plan, and you have the opportunity to see past attachments out side of self, especially when these attachments are trying to release themselves of you. If you dont do the work, you will attract more of what has become your now reality.
Change is instantaneous.....try it....you will find yourself and your connection to all that is...within you.
Love, Light %26#039;n%26#039; Laughter!
Harriett Potty|||control your initial emotion to any event,by not reacting too fast or saying the first thing that comes to your mind.Think of other%26#039;s feelings before you speak,weight your words.Don%26#039;t refrain your emotions, just try and learn to keep them inside for a few seconds, or sometimes days,before saying or doing something you would regret.I went through that myself.I got a lot better and avoided many dangerous/painful situations or consequences.|||Try JESUS! He says we must change our hearts and lives because the kingdom of heaven is near. And He says I know the plans I have for you. Plans to prosper you. We must become like Him. Jesus treated everyone lovingly,compassionately,and fairly even when they didn%26#039;t deserve it. So must we.|||i hope %26amp; wish u good luck therapy, reading good books,
joining discussion groups , or just self discipline can all be helpful ....... some join a religion but i prefer studying ethics or phisolophy or the like instead hopefuly you will find your niche.|||When you find yourself acting like that look at what triggered that reaction in you and express your feelings politely to whoever. If you are unable to do that then do nothing until you have calmed down enough to proceed respectfully. After doing that for months you will find that you won%26#039;t react the same way you have been doing.|||Well, you are on the right course, the first is to want to change, and you already stated that. Have you considered volunteering for shelters, or others that are in need. This really gives one a Reality check about Life, and how others react to kindness. Good for you, I wish all the Success. Take Care.|||Meditate
If one does not go within one will go without...and seriously we do not want this for ourselves or anyone we love....
First choice is to breathe....
Next choice after that may well to do to serve our highest potential to be the best we can be at any given moment. The power is now, right now, make the choice right now, to change.
Ask for cosmic help and you will receive, start opening your eyes for the help can come in a %26#039;book%26#039; or a simple %26#039;word%26#039; that is a keyword in your mind, that triggers the undeniable knowledge you have contained within you. Release it into your conscious life and live it, be it and just be happy. You are part of a grander plan, and you have the opportunity to see past attachments out side of self, especially when these attachments are trying to release themselves of you. If you dont do the work, you will attract more of what has become your now reality.
Change is instantaneous.....try it....you will find yourself and your connection to all that is...within you.
Love, Light %26#039;n%26#039; Laughter!
Harriett Potty|||control your initial emotion to any event,by not reacting too fast or saying the first thing that comes to your mind.Think of other%26#039;s feelings before you speak,weight your words.Don%26#039;t refrain your emotions, just try and learn to keep them inside for a few seconds, or sometimes days,before saying or doing something you would regret.I went through that myself.I got a lot better and avoided many dangerous/painful situations or consequences.|||Try JESUS! He says we must change our hearts and lives because the kingdom of heaven is near. And He says I know the plans I have for you. Plans to prosper you. We must become like Him. Jesus treated everyone lovingly,compassionately,and fairly even when they didn%26#039;t deserve it. So must we.|||i hope %26amp; wish u good luck therapy, reading good books,
joining discussion groups , or just self discipline can all be helpful ....... some join a religion but i prefer studying ethics or phisolophy or the like instead hopefuly you will find your niche.|||When you find yourself acting like that look at what triggered that reaction in you and express your feelings politely to whoever. If you are unable to do that then do nothing until you have calmed down enough to proceed respectfully. After doing that for months you will find that you won%26#039;t react the same way you have been doing.|||Well, you are on the right course, the first is to want to change, and you already stated that. Have you considered volunteering for shelters, or others that are in need. This really gives one a Reality check about Life, and how others react to kindness. Good for you, I wish all the Success. Take Care.|||Meditate
Do people have the right to force you to change your attitude?
If I don%26#039;t change my attitude, deaf people will make my life a living hell.
Many people said I am nice, but sometimes my attitude sucks...
Why I have to be NICE all the time?
Then deaf people think I got bipolar or something.
I can%26#039;t be nice all the time... if people keep pissing me off,
I will pissed them off too.
Who the hell do they think they are? Trying to tell me how I should act? They can kiss my a**.
I only be nice to people because the old saying %26quot;Treat people the way you want to be treated.%26quot;
Deaf people want to take advantage of my kindness and
their attitude SUCK... Why can%26#039;t they treat me NICE?|||Only BEHAVIOR is measurable and able to be manipulated by others.
ATTITUDE IS ONE%26#039;S OWN!|||What a truly sad and weary existence you must lead and it can only get worse!!!!!|||what do deaf people and your attitude have to do with anything? this sounds like a rant.......i hope you find your self in it all...i am taking off my hip waders and gong on to the next question.......|||EVEN A GREAT EMPEROR WILL VANISH IF HE HAS NO ONE TO POINT OUT HIS MISTAKES.--SAYS TAMIL SAVANT THIRUVALLUVAR. AS EVERYBODY HAS ATLEAST ONE PERSON WISER THAN HIMSELF ADVICE IS INDISPENSABLE
Many people said I am nice, but sometimes my attitude sucks...
Why I have to be NICE all the time?
Then deaf people think I got bipolar or something.
I can%26#039;t be nice all the time... if people keep pissing me off,
I will pissed them off too.
Who the hell do they think they are? Trying to tell me how I should act? They can kiss my a**.
I only be nice to people because the old saying %26quot;Treat people the way you want to be treated.%26quot;
Deaf people want to take advantage of my kindness and
their attitude SUCK... Why can%26#039;t they treat me NICE?|||Only BEHAVIOR is measurable and able to be manipulated by others.
ATTITUDE IS ONE%26#039;S OWN!|||What a truly sad and weary existence you must lead and it can only get worse!!!!!|||what do deaf people and your attitude have to do with anything? this sounds like a rant.......i hope you find your self in it all...i am taking off my hip waders and gong on to the next question.......|||EVEN A GREAT EMPEROR WILL VANISH IF HE HAS NO ONE TO POINT OUT HIS MISTAKES.--SAYS TAMIL SAVANT THIRUVALLUVAR. AS EVERYBODY HAS ATLEAST ONE PERSON WISER THAN HIMSELF ADVICE IS INDISPENSABLE
Which should you change first to make you a better person, your attitude or your behavior? Why?
Just a simple question, do you change your behavior first or you attitude in order for you to be a better person? Why?
I%26#039;m dealing with a teenager with problems and need to understand how to aproach the situation. The situation is not important, I%26#039;m just wondering if we need to work on behavior or attitude...?|||i would say attitude, because,
if you can give this teen a different outlook at the situation, it may change his/her attitude toward the situation....once the attitude changes - the behavior will change.
get creative, think back to when you were a teen.........
GOOD LUCK!|||I believe it is attitude. Once the attitude gets adjusted, I think the behavior will follow|||Behavior, attitude will follow.|||The behavior ought to come first, I think. I have heard it said that %26quot;we can%26#039;t think our way into right actions, but we can act our way into right thinking.%26quot;|||I think sometimes that attitude affects behavior. If someone is in a good mood their behavior is also good? Does this help?|||your attitude and your behavior will follow. Because you put goodness in you get goodness in return.|||I think it depends on the situation, in general, I%26#039;d have said the attitude because PERCEPTION pretty much rules the way we interact or respond to stimuli in the world.
However, take smoking. I stopped smoking but really felt resistant. I still did it because it was the right thing to do (this is over 10 years ago!) but my attitude wasn%26#039;t %26quot;with it.%26quot; It took years to actually be a %26quot;happy ex-smoker%26quot; (one who feels sure she never wants to do it again).|||Change your attitude first,then your behavior will follow.|||behavior first...then attitude.
stop smoking so you don%26#039;t pollute your body...then you can work on being %26quot;happy%26quot; about it.
stop punching people and you won%26#039;t go to jail...then you can work on interpersonal relationships.
start treating your parents with respect...then they will learn to respect you...then you will develop self-respect.|||You could argue both points, I think. People might say that you can%26#039;t change the output unless you change the reason behind that output, so you would have to address attitude first. I believe, and tend to practice, the idea that if you embrace a certain behaviour...your attitude can change along with it. For instance, I found myself a couple of years ago making rather stereotypical, generic comments of Hispanic people and I sounded racist. So, I signed up to help assist in an ESL class. My attitude didn%26#039;t change overnight, but my behavior was different as I was interacting with Hispanics, and I never had before. And my attitude changed because of the behaviors that I adopted. If you have a teenager, they are old enough to understand that sometimes you have to act a certain way even if you feel like being another way (i.e. being polite to a rude teacher, not hitting a classmate, listening to poeple in authorative positions) and they should be able to adjust their behaviors and hopefully their attitude can change as well, and if it doesn%26#039;t, at least they are behaving correctly. If you thye can%26#039;t control their behaviors, despite their attitude, then you have bigger problems than just a rotten attitude. You have a teenager who won%26#039;t listen to authority and can%26#039;t except other points of view and who might have trouble adapting to society%26#039;s expectations.|||behavior first! you must restore control and sanity...
... and yet attitude may be necessary to get anywhere at all so
do your best and work on both and try to get some outside help as well, AND
consider Alanon... it will transform your life and give you WHAT YOU NEED... give it a try and good luck
.
http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/meetings/鈥?/a>
.|||Attitude determines behavior, so one must change the attitude first, and then behavior follows|||Free your mind, and your @ss will follow. Attitude first, I think.|||He who seperates himself indulges his desires and shows contempt for sound advise of any kind. (Proverbs 18:1)
To act without knowing how you function is not good; and if you rush ahead you will miss your goal.(19:2)
A person is responsible to prepare his heart, but how the tongue speaks is from Adonai. (16:1)
Giving an honest answer is like giving a kiss.(24:26)
With patience a ruler can be won over, and a gentle tongue can break bones. (25:15)
Above everything else, guard your heart; for it is the source of life%26#039;s consequences. Keep crooked speech out of your mouth, banish deciet from your lips. Let your eyes look straight ahead, fix your gaze on what lies in front of you. Level the path for your feet, let all your ways be properly prepared; tehn deviate neither right nor left; and keep your foot far from evil. (4:23-27)
I hope this helps. Your behavior is a reflection of your thoughts, and your thoughts are reflected by your behavior.
All the answers you need, are written in the book of life, and if you lean not on your own understanding, but on the word of God, your paths will be set straight before you. The best thing you can do for this troubled teen, is show by example.|||Almost all behavior is based on a belief system or attitude.
First,
(1)Perhaps you could consider changing your approach when dealing with the situation. Remember words have %26quot;energy%26quot; and if you tweak your approach a bit
and say that the two of you are attempting to solve a problem together.
(If this is a Parent/Child relationship I%26#039;m assuming you would both like to express love to each other more and have a peaceful relationship.)
(2) Base your problem solving on mutual respect.
You may want to consider changing your mind set when communicating with him/her
Your statement is , %26quot;I%26#039;m dealing with a teenager with problems%26quot;
Words have an energy
Try this idea %26quot;I%26#039;m dealing with a teenager who is discovering who they are, and I would like to help.%26quot;
I think that if you each sit down and write what your ideal outcome would be and then share it with each other. You can see what you have in common and I%26#039;ll bet it is more similar than you may assume now.
(3) Look at how each of you can compromise and find a place to start.
(4)
Get human - tell him or her something real about you.
ie: your insecurity%26#039;s , struggles and how you worked it out.
Ask them to share the same with you.
I also Highly suggest that you watch the %26quot;Secret%26quot; together - you can watch it online or buy a copy, borrow a copy.
here is a link to the site:
http://www.thesecret.tv/
Most of all be kind|||Either and both.
If you gave a hint of a clue as to what is going on, we might be able to make reasonable suggestions.
As others have said: behavior flows from attitude; and attitude flows from behavior.
People have been able to change their thinking, and find their behavior changes; and people have changed their behavior, and found their thinking changes.
The interaction between these, and the nature of change itself is anything BUT simple.
Short answer: change the one that seems changeble or that the person is willing to change.
I highly recommend you get yourself a copy of Virginia Axline%26#039;s Play Therapy (the principles apply to older kids -- even if play isn%26#039;t the main mode).
When you try to change someone, they tend to resist.
You%26#039;re telling them that they are not acceptable as a human being the way they are.
They probably are the way they are because everyone in their lives has always been communicating this very message.
If you listen to the teen, and really grasp what they%26#039;re saying, and why they feel as they do, and accept them for who they are, that can give them the emotional space to reexamine how they feel and act, and come to new ways of being on their own.
When you try to get them to change, it%26#039;s just much less effective.
Uh, and, the situation is SO important -- knowing something about it would have been helpful.
If this person wants to change, that, too, would make a big difference in how to proceed.
But if they don%26#039;t (you don%26#039;t give a sex, and I hate writing filled with she/he all over the place), then they won%26#039;t -- people can rarely be argued out of things they didn%26#039;t reason their way to.
I%26#039;m dealing with a teenager with problems and need to understand how to aproach the situation. The situation is not important, I%26#039;m just wondering if we need to work on behavior or attitude...?|||i would say attitude, because,
if you can give this teen a different outlook at the situation, it may change his/her attitude toward the situation....once the attitude changes - the behavior will change.
get creative, think back to when you were a teen.........
GOOD LUCK!|||I believe it is attitude. Once the attitude gets adjusted, I think the behavior will follow|||Behavior, attitude will follow.|||The behavior ought to come first, I think. I have heard it said that %26quot;we can%26#039;t think our way into right actions, but we can act our way into right thinking.%26quot;|||I think sometimes that attitude affects behavior. If someone is in a good mood their behavior is also good? Does this help?|||your attitude and your behavior will follow. Because you put goodness in you get goodness in return.|||I think it depends on the situation, in general, I%26#039;d have said the attitude because PERCEPTION pretty much rules the way we interact or respond to stimuli in the world.
However, take smoking. I stopped smoking but really felt resistant. I still did it because it was the right thing to do (this is over 10 years ago!) but my attitude wasn%26#039;t %26quot;with it.%26quot; It took years to actually be a %26quot;happy ex-smoker%26quot; (one who feels sure she never wants to do it again).|||Change your attitude first,then your behavior will follow.|||behavior first...then attitude.
stop smoking so you don%26#039;t pollute your body...then you can work on being %26quot;happy%26quot; about it.
stop punching people and you won%26#039;t go to jail...then you can work on interpersonal relationships.
start treating your parents with respect...then they will learn to respect you...then you will develop self-respect.|||You could argue both points, I think. People might say that you can%26#039;t change the output unless you change the reason behind that output, so you would have to address attitude first. I believe, and tend to practice, the idea that if you embrace a certain behaviour...your attitude can change along with it. For instance, I found myself a couple of years ago making rather stereotypical, generic comments of Hispanic people and I sounded racist. So, I signed up to help assist in an ESL class. My attitude didn%26#039;t change overnight, but my behavior was different as I was interacting with Hispanics, and I never had before. And my attitude changed because of the behaviors that I adopted. If you have a teenager, they are old enough to understand that sometimes you have to act a certain way even if you feel like being another way (i.e. being polite to a rude teacher, not hitting a classmate, listening to poeple in authorative positions) and they should be able to adjust their behaviors and hopefully their attitude can change as well, and if it doesn%26#039;t, at least they are behaving correctly. If you thye can%26#039;t control their behaviors, despite their attitude, then you have bigger problems than just a rotten attitude. You have a teenager who won%26#039;t listen to authority and can%26#039;t except other points of view and who might have trouble adapting to society%26#039;s expectations.|||behavior first! you must restore control and sanity...
... and yet attitude may be necessary to get anywhere at all so
do your best and work on both and try to get some outside help as well, AND
consider Alanon... it will transform your life and give you WHAT YOU NEED... give it a try and good luck
.
http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/meetings/鈥?/a>
.|||Attitude determines behavior, so one must change the attitude first, and then behavior follows|||Free your mind, and your @ss will follow. Attitude first, I think.|||He who seperates himself indulges his desires and shows contempt for sound advise of any kind. (Proverbs 18:1)
To act without knowing how you function is not good; and if you rush ahead you will miss your goal.(19:2)
A person is responsible to prepare his heart, but how the tongue speaks is from Adonai. (16:1)
Giving an honest answer is like giving a kiss.(24:26)
With patience a ruler can be won over, and a gentle tongue can break bones. (25:15)
Above everything else, guard your heart; for it is the source of life%26#039;s consequences. Keep crooked speech out of your mouth, banish deciet from your lips. Let your eyes look straight ahead, fix your gaze on what lies in front of you. Level the path for your feet, let all your ways be properly prepared; tehn deviate neither right nor left; and keep your foot far from evil. (4:23-27)
I hope this helps. Your behavior is a reflection of your thoughts, and your thoughts are reflected by your behavior.
All the answers you need, are written in the book of life, and if you lean not on your own understanding, but on the word of God, your paths will be set straight before you. The best thing you can do for this troubled teen, is show by example.|||Almost all behavior is based on a belief system or attitude.
First,
(1)Perhaps you could consider changing your approach when dealing with the situation. Remember words have %26quot;energy%26quot; and if you tweak your approach a bit
and say that the two of you are attempting to solve a problem together.
(If this is a Parent/Child relationship I%26#039;m assuming you would both like to express love to each other more and have a peaceful relationship.)
(2) Base your problem solving on mutual respect.
You may want to consider changing your mind set when communicating with him/her
Your statement is , %26quot;I%26#039;m dealing with a teenager with problems%26quot;
Words have an energy
Try this idea %26quot;I%26#039;m dealing with a teenager who is discovering who they are, and I would like to help.%26quot;
I think that if you each sit down and write what your ideal outcome would be and then share it with each other. You can see what you have in common and I%26#039;ll bet it is more similar than you may assume now.
(3) Look at how each of you can compromise and find a place to start.
(4)
Get human - tell him or her something real about you.
ie: your insecurity%26#039;s , struggles and how you worked it out.
Ask them to share the same with you.
I also Highly suggest that you watch the %26quot;Secret%26quot; together - you can watch it online or buy a copy, borrow a copy.
here is a link to the site:
http://www.thesecret.tv/
Most of all be kind|||Either and both.
If you gave a hint of a clue as to what is going on, we might be able to make reasonable suggestions.
As others have said: behavior flows from attitude; and attitude flows from behavior.
People have been able to change their thinking, and find their behavior changes; and people have changed their behavior, and found their thinking changes.
The interaction between these, and the nature of change itself is anything BUT simple.
Short answer: change the one that seems changeble or that the person is willing to change.
I highly recommend you get yourself a copy of Virginia Axline%26#039;s Play Therapy (the principles apply to older kids -- even if play isn%26#039;t the main mode).
When you try to change someone, they tend to resist.
You%26#039;re telling them that they are not acceptable as a human being the way they are.
They probably are the way they are because everyone in their lives has always been communicating this very message.
If you listen to the teen, and really grasp what they%26#039;re saying, and why they feel as they do, and accept them for who they are, that can give them the emotional space to reexamine how they feel and act, and come to new ways of being on their own.
When you try to get them to change, it%26#039;s just much less effective.
Uh, and, the situation is SO important -- knowing something about it would have been helpful.
If this person wants to change, that, too, would make a big difference in how to proceed.
But if they don%26#039;t (you don%26#039;t give a sex, and I hate writing filled with she/he all over the place), then they won%26#039;t -- people can rarely be argued out of things they didn%26#039;t reason their way to.
Can a teacher change your grade because of your "attitude"?
The other day in English, we had a pop quiz on The Oddessey. I originally got 100%, and on the quiz I wrote %26quot;a waste of paper%26quot; because there were like two answers on it. I wasn%26#039;t trying to offend her in any way, but somehow she found it offending and wrote on it %26quot;Sassy! Bold! I%26#039;m sorry I wasted your paper on studies! I didn%26#039;t bother recording this grade - Waste of my time! Zero! Change your attitude! FINAL! No discussion!%26quot; This grade affected my overall grade by 5%, which is two whole grades. I don%26#039;t think it%26#039;s right how she can change my grade because of my %26quot;attitude%26quot;. What do your think?
Sorry so long!
Answer, please!|||he/she can not do that, if your in high school or middle school tell your parents|||no it isn%26#039;t right - if she didn%26#039;t like what you wrote she had a right to say it was not related to the question - she had a right to say it jumped track - she had a right to say this assignment isn%26#039;t about paper it is about ______
talk to her - tell her you see her point (if you do) - apologize or live with the results - what she did is not against the law - what you did was not against the law BUT
it was her class
her test
and that is how life works.|||So what was the point of writing :%26quot;a waste of paper%26quot; on the quiz? Are you part of the Save a Tree foundation? What possible reason is there for writing this on the quiz other than challenging your teacher%26#039;s methods or authority?
As far as her methodology was concerned, she may have chosen a different alternative (detention, parent conference, or something else), but this seemed to have gotten your attention. Maybe next time, you%26#039;ll keep your unsolicited opinion to yourself and enjoy your 100.|||Your attitude failed and therefore she took that into account when grading your paper.
It%26#039;s her classroom and you%26#039;re the student. She makes the rules. Maybe next time you%26#039;ll think about being rude.
Sorry so long!
Answer, please!|||he/she can not do that, if your in high school or middle school tell your parents|||no it isn%26#039;t right - if she didn%26#039;t like what you wrote she had a right to say it was not related to the question - she had a right to say it jumped track - she had a right to say this assignment isn%26#039;t about paper it is about ______
talk to her - tell her you see her point (if you do) - apologize or live with the results - what she did is not against the law - what you did was not against the law BUT
it was her class
her test
and that is how life works.|||So what was the point of writing :%26quot;a waste of paper%26quot; on the quiz? Are you part of the Save a Tree foundation? What possible reason is there for writing this on the quiz other than challenging your teacher%26#039;s methods or authority?
As far as her methodology was concerned, she may have chosen a different alternative (detention, parent conference, or something else), but this seemed to have gotten your attention. Maybe next time, you%26#039;ll keep your unsolicited opinion to yourself and enjoy your 100.|||Your attitude failed and therefore she took that into account when grading your paper.
It%26#039;s her classroom and you%26#039;re the student. She makes the rules. Maybe next time you%26#039;ll think about being rude.
How can you change your attitude so you can get your ex boyfriend back?
Well me %26amp; my ex boyfriend was talken the other nite when I stayed at his house %26amp; I asked him if we would ever be together again? He said %26quot;yes, he want to be with me again, but I need to change my atttitude%26quot; yes, I know I need to change it, but can someone please give me some tips on how to that. So, when I called him or when he calls me, we talk %26amp; we dont argue, thats because I am trying my best to change it for us, cuz I really miss him!|||what drew him to you in the first place??? you can change but sometimes trying to reform for others you lose sight of who you are......work on what you need to..does he need to brush up too????whats good for the goose is good for the gander.....................|||why would u change yourself for him? it won%26#039;t last...!!! if he can%26#039;t accept you for you, then what the hell is the point? he will be loving the %26quot;new you%26quot;, while the old you is screaming to come out! don%26#039;t be silly! find a guy that loves you for you and stick on that path! do not EVER change yourself for your partner! because they will find more and more things to change about you in the future, until you don%26#039;t recognise yourself! ask yourself this! does your attitude effect you? or others other than him? and are you happy with you?
How come when u fall in love you change your attitude and your way of bieng?
Well i just want to know when u are with someone do u have to act a certain way?|||%26quot;Falling in love should make you want to be a better person.%26quot;
Simple as that. However, you don%26#039;t have to %26quot;act%26quot; a certain way. When you%26#039;re in love, should have the ability to %26quot;be yourself%26quot; around that person more than anyone else in the world.|||you should just be yourself
Simple as that. However, you don%26#039;t have to %26quot;act%26quot; a certain way. When you%26#039;re in love, should have the ability to %26quot;be yourself%26quot; around that person more than anyone else in the world.|||you should just be yourself
Did you ever lead a boring or unfulfilled life and then suddenly change your attitude?
I would like to know how many out there just had a pretty routine life for awhile or a certain chapter in their lives and felt unfulfilled during that time........and did you have some sort of awakening/a new outlook/change of attitude,then suddenly started doing all kinds of things out there in the world not only to make yourself happy, but helping others as well?
What was it exactly that cause this %26#039;awakening%26#039; within you?
and what types of interesting things are you doing now %26amp; for the future?
just really curious...... :o)|||I did.
I was in a very unhappy marriage, completely controlled by a man who did not respect me.
I started taking a karate class, and discovered a strength inside me that I never knew I had. I learned how to channel and release it, and in the process, grew to trust myself.
And when the ranting raving lunatic I was married to demanded a divorce for the umpteenth time, because I expressed an opinion he did not like, I called his bluff and agreed. Then watched him cry and beg me to stay with him, telling me he never wanted a divorce; it was just the only thing he could think of to keep me in line.
I left.
Months later, I found one of my karate classmates again and invited him out to lunch.
Years later, I married him.
All of it stemmed from one simple thing: that karate class.
.
What was it exactly that cause this %26#039;awakening%26#039; within you?
and what types of interesting things are you doing now %26amp; for the future?
just really curious...... :o)|||I did.
I was in a very unhappy marriage, completely controlled by a man who did not respect me.
I started taking a karate class, and discovered a strength inside me that I never knew I had. I learned how to channel and release it, and in the process, grew to trust myself.
And when the ranting raving lunatic I was married to demanded a divorce for the umpteenth time, because I expressed an opinion he did not like, I called his bluff and agreed. Then watched him cry and beg me to stay with him, telling me he never wanted a divorce; it was just the only thing he could think of to keep me in line.
I left.
Months later, I found one of my karate classmates again and invited him out to lunch.
Years later, I married him.
All of it stemmed from one simple thing: that karate class.
.
How can you develop your MIND power better by changing your ATTITUDE towards people and things to positive?
and how to let go of past resentments and angers?
is this what is wrong most of the time with people who are angry?
they are thinking people are wanting to take advantage of them or compete with them and vice versa?
why so many think this way and how to change this to what?
which attitude is better and how makes person different after?
please explain and describe
thanks for your answwers!|||and how to let go of past resentments and angers? I have learned that when people hurt your feelings it is only important unless you insist on remembering it. Forgive (not forget) Let it go, it is not easy to not remember what people have done to you but keep in mind people make mistakes all of the time. We do stupid things and most of the time at the worst moments that you can imagine.
is this what is wrong most of the time with people who are angry? They are misunderstood/believe they are and are not being heard/understood.
they are thinking people are wanting to take advantage of them or compete with them and vice versa? Sounds more like paranoia to me than anything. But that is low self-esteem issues. As far as competing. You could very well be a competitive person by nature. I know I am.
why so many think this way and how to change this to what? Because that is all they know/ been taught by family, friends, etc not necessarily verbally but by watching how they respond to situations and have not been retrained in their ways of thinking. You can change this by taking it one person at a time and one situation at a time. Force yourself to think the exact opposite way of how you normally would.
which attitude is better and how makes person different after? Being positive is great.. Not always able to pull it off, but if you look at a situation think of oh say a woman walks by a guy who smiles at her. Think of why is he smiling. Did he have something good happen to him? Is he up to something? Is he flirting? Is he just being nice? Which is most positive? You do not know exactly because you are not a mindreader. Which one would you choose and why? He may very well have just decided to be nice to someone while he is trying to make himself a better person. Maybe he had been told he needs to smile more.|||a positive attitude releases feel good chemicals in the brain.. such as seratonin and dopamine, therefore allowing a happier less stressed approach to mental requirements and demands.. which, in turn, afford the power of more productive applications from the mind/brain.
is this what is wrong most of the time with people who are angry?
they are thinking people are wanting to take advantage of them or compete with them and vice versa?
why so many think this way and how to change this to what?
which attitude is better and how makes person different after?
please explain and describe
thanks for your answwers!|||and how to let go of past resentments and angers? I have learned that when people hurt your feelings it is only important unless you insist on remembering it. Forgive (not forget) Let it go, it is not easy to not remember what people have done to you but keep in mind people make mistakes all of the time. We do stupid things and most of the time at the worst moments that you can imagine.
is this what is wrong most of the time with people who are angry? They are misunderstood/believe they are and are not being heard/understood.
they are thinking people are wanting to take advantage of them or compete with them and vice versa? Sounds more like paranoia to me than anything. But that is low self-esteem issues. As far as competing. You could very well be a competitive person by nature. I know I am.
why so many think this way and how to change this to what? Because that is all they know/ been taught by family, friends, etc not necessarily verbally but by watching how they respond to situations and have not been retrained in their ways of thinking. You can change this by taking it one person at a time and one situation at a time. Force yourself to think the exact opposite way of how you normally would.
which attitude is better and how makes person different after? Being positive is great.. Not always able to pull it off, but if you look at a situation think of oh say a woman walks by a guy who smiles at her. Think of why is he smiling. Did he have something good happen to him? Is he up to something? Is he flirting? Is he just being nice? Which is most positive? You do not know exactly because you are not a mindreader. Which one would you choose and why? He may very well have just decided to be nice to someone while he is trying to make himself a better person. Maybe he had been told he needs to smile more.|||a positive attitude releases feel good chemicals in the brain.. such as seratonin and dopamine, therefore allowing a happier less stressed approach to mental requirements and demands.. which, in turn, afford the power of more productive applications from the mind/brain.
Women : how would your attitude change towards a male colleague/friend, if you just found out?
uses services of escort girls to meet his sex desires (he is single and dont want commitment)
he is a normal, friendly guy, and someone you would not consider for casual sex/ dating.|||personally it wouldnt bother me|||My last boyfriend lost his virginity to a prostitute, my best male friend visits them regularly.
And I really don%26#039;t care.
Edit: I don%26#039;t know? I just have an open mind and an appreciation that the male%26#039;s sex drive is very very high.|||How about you don%26#039;t tell any female colleagues/friends about it? I would imagine escort girls are discreet and they won%26#039;t be blabbing to your friends.|||In all honesty, I would lose a small bit of respect for that person, but I wouldn%26#039;t care to the point of ending a friendship. I wouldn%26#039;t consider dating anyone who had been with a prostitu... I mean escort girl, for a number of reasons, though.|||None of my business.
I%26#039;d probably have an initial %26quot;Eww%26quot; response, but hey, who am I to judge?
I doubt they would tell me about it as I%26#039;d rather not know about someones sex life unless they were a prospective mate.|||I%26#039;d say that%26#039;s something you should probably keep to yourself...|||I know normal, friendly guys who have been single and don%26#039;t want commitment and still don%26#039;t bother procuring escorts. Is horniness really all that insufferable?|||Keep my distance...what else does he tolerate?
he is a normal, friendly guy, and someone you would not consider for casual sex/ dating.|||personally it wouldnt bother me|||My last boyfriend lost his virginity to a prostitute, my best male friend visits them regularly.
And I really don%26#039;t care.
Edit: I don%26#039;t know? I just have an open mind and an appreciation that the male%26#039;s sex drive is very very high.|||How about you don%26#039;t tell any female colleagues/friends about it? I would imagine escort girls are discreet and they won%26#039;t be blabbing to your friends.|||In all honesty, I would lose a small bit of respect for that person, but I wouldn%26#039;t care to the point of ending a friendship. I wouldn%26#039;t consider dating anyone who had been with a prostitu... I mean escort girl, for a number of reasons, though.|||None of my business.
I%26#039;d probably have an initial %26quot;Eww%26quot; response, but hey, who am I to judge?
I doubt they would tell me about it as I%26#039;d rather not know about someones sex life unless they were a prospective mate.|||I%26#039;d say that%26#039;s something you should probably keep to yourself...|||I know normal, friendly guys who have been single and don%26#039;t want commitment and still don%26#039;t bother procuring escorts. Is horniness really all that insufferable?|||Keep my distance...what else does he tolerate?
How can you change your attitude/personality? Even small bits of it? People call me cocky - I don't want to be
I%26#039;ve been told that a lot lately ... And once I heard it, more than once, I started evaluating how I think about people, what I say, but most importantly HOW I say it. It may not be that you are cocky, but rather the impression you%26#039;re giving because of how you deliver your message.
I think that I have strong opinions, and when I express them, I do, after doing a self evaluation, sound like I%26#039;m a know-it-all, or that I think I am. Or how I carry myself makes me seem vain. Inside, I don%26#039;t feel that way at all, I simply feel strongly about certain things.
Take a good, hard, look at yourself, and see where there needs to be changes. You%26#039;ll know when %26amp; where to do it, once you figure out what needs to change. It simply takes effort on one%26#039;s part to say too much sometimes, or choose different words than the ones you want to use.
Good luck.
P.S. Don%26#039;t lose your confidence in the process, just be less aggressive.|||Stop bragging...
Do you like hearing one person constantly telling you how great they are and how good they can do everything? Do you like people that never listen to you and take every chance to let you know that they%26#039;re better than you? Probably not and guess what?
Noboby else likes hearing it either...|||ive been told countless times by my closest friends and the ladies in my life %26quot; i thought you were cocky as hell, until i got to know you and you are no where near cocky%26quot; %26quot; confident. thats what you are%26quot;. I stand tall, smile big, carry myself with direction and purpose, plus im able to talk about more than the weather, in a conversation. when i arrive my presence is felt. it used to bother me now i just laugh bcuz a lot of people love to hate on others for no reason, so try not to take it the wrong way. just understand there isnt really a why? but an it just is!
@ 18 or 19 i made a formula for personal change that has worked indeffinately.... %26quot;the three r%26#039;s%26quot; is what I call it... REALIZE...RECOGNIZE... REACT... realize that there is something you want to change about yourself, recognize each time you do the behavior that ur trying to change, and Re-act. (change the behavior to your liking). it works for me try it..
I think that I have strong opinions, and when I express them, I do, after doing a self evaluation, sound like I%26#039;m a know-it-all, or that I think I am. Or how I carry myself makes me seem vain. Inside, I don%26#039;t feel that way at all, I simply feel strongly about certain things.
Take a good, hard, look at yourself, and see where there needs to be changes. You%26#039;ll know when %26amp; where to do it, once you figure out what needs to change. It simply takes effort on one%26#039;s part to say too much sometimes, or choose different words than the ones you want to use.
Good luck.
P.S. Don%26#039;t lose your confidence in the process, just be less aggressive.|||Stop bragging...
Do you like hearing one person constantly telling you how great they are and how good they can do everything? Do you like people that never listen to you and take every chance to let you know that they%26#039;re better than you? Probably not and guess what?
Noboby else likes hearing it either...|||ive been told countless times by my closest friends and the ladies in my life %26quot; i thought you were cocky as hell, until i got to know you and you are no where near cocky%26quot; %26quot; confident. thats what you are%26quot;. I stand tall, smile big, carry myself with direction and purpose, plus im able to talk about more than the weather, in a conversation. when i arrive my presence is felt. it used to bother me now i just laugh bcuz a lot of people love to hate on others for no reason, so try not to take it the wrong way. just understand there isnt really a why? but an it just is!
@ 18 or 19 i made a formula for personal change that has worked indeffinately.... %26quot;the three r%26#039;s%26quot; is what I call it... REALIZE...RECOGNIZE... REACT... realize that there is something you want to change about yourself, recognize each time you do the behavior that ur trying to change, and Re-act. (change the behavior to your liking). it works for me try it..
Does having a makeover in your attitude and confidence change the whole of you as a person?
Last year I was constantly distracted by a stupid guy that didn%26#039;t care about me enough to talk to me, and it brought me down so much because because I had no self-worth. Now I%26#039;m through this pity and I want to move forward and develop into a better person.
How does getting a brand new change in your attitude change you as a person?|||You project what you feel by your attitude. You can say a simple %26quot;hi%26quot; in about every emotion in the book. If your attitude changes, everone sees you differently, and when the change is for the positive, they%26#039;ll be positive back at you. As a bonus, you%26#039;ll attract positive people towards you and push away most negative people. That makes you feel better and you change because of it.
How does getting a brand new change in your attitude change you as a person?|||You project what you feel by your attitude. You can say a simple %26quot;hi%26quot; in about every emotion in the book. If your attitude changes, everone sees you differently, and when the change is for the positive, they%26#039;ll be positive back at you. As a bonus, you%26#039;ll attract positive people towards you and push away most negative people. That makes you feel better and you change because of it.
How can Juvenal's diabetes change your attitude?
my friend was just diagnosed with Juvenal%26#039;s diabetes and she is acting different and i want to know what i can expect from her.|||Juvenile diabetes changes your life. It still overwhelms me and I have had it for eight years. She now has to worry about all kinds of health consequences and she has to take care of herself every day. It may depress her, she may rebel and do things bad for her health or she may take it all in stride. Sooner or later she will make her peace with it. you just need to be there for her and you need to understand that it is great that you are looking up stuff and attempting to be there for her but since you dont have diabetes there will always be some things that she will feel like you don%26#039;t understand. It sucks right now but it will get better.|||Juvenile diabetes (type 1) is a scary experience at first! Your friend will probably either want to talk about it a lot or not talk about it at all. The best thing that you can do is go with the flow and do what she wants for now. If she wants to talk about it all the time, let her. That%26#039;s good! Listen and talk with her. If she doesn%26#039;t want to talk at all, do that! Keep her occupied with other stuff.
She%26#039;s probably scared, nervous and overwhelmed by all of it. Or she may be empowered to beat it!
Good luck and support your friend through it all!
She%26#039;s probably scared, nervous and overwhelmed by all of it. Or she may be empowered to beat it!
Good luck and support your friend through it all!
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